#birthday

I wasn't very good about juggling family and my career. I was interested in who was coming to the children's birthday party, what my son was writing. I was thinking about Legos. ↗

— Jill Clayburgh

#about #birthday #birthday party #career #children

All the world is birthday cake, so take a piece, but not too much. ↗

— George Harrison

#cake #much #piece #take #too

I wouldn’t want the guests at my birthday party confusing my celebration with the Oscars. That’s why I’m having the awards ceremony after we eat cake and I open my presents.
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— Jarod Kintz

#awards-ceremony #birthday #cake #celebrate #celebration

You hate birthdays yet pee your pants over presents. There is clearly something wrong with you," Garrett joked. ↗

— T.E. Sivec

#funny #garrett #haha #lol #parker

At my last birthday party I had fun and really let myself go. Literally. I opened the cages where I keep my clones and I let myself go, all 333 versions of myself. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#absurdity #birthday #clones #change

The best date I’ve ever been on was March 5th, 1982, the year I was born. For as long as I live, I’ll never forget that date.
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— Jarod Kintz

#birth #birthday #born #date #dating

The accumulation of birthdays is the leading cause of death in the United States and other large land masses. Now while that may not be 100% accurate, it is at least 88% accurate. Actually, the last sentence itself might not have been 100% accurate, but I’m 88% sure it was. Maybe I should just brush up on fractions and percentages before making statements that are liable to hurt the funeral industry, because if birthdays aren’t killing people then it’s bad for the mortality business. And if you can’t trust somebody to die, then you can’t trust somebody. But I’m somebody you can trust. I’m at least 88% trustworthy, at least 88% of the time. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#accurate #birthday #death #die #fractions

Jarod Kintz Day—it’s not just my birthday, but it should be a holiday that’s mandatory to celebrate, punishable by death if you don’t. It’ll be a holiday that honors freedom.
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— Jarod Kintz

#celebrate #death #freedom #holiday #honor

Let gratitude be the pillow upon which you kneel to say your nightly prayer. And let faith be the bridge you build to overcome evil and welcome good. ↗

— Maya Angelou

#gratitude #maya-angelou #oprah #faith

Romance novels are birthday cake and life is often peanut butter and jelly. I think everyone should have lots of delicious romance novels lying around for those times when the peanut butter of life gets stuck to the roof of your mouth. ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#cake #life #novels #romance #life