#funny

And you'd think that killing people would make them like you, but it doesn't. It just- it just makes them dead. ↗

— Joe Walker (as Voldemort in AVPM)

#joe-walker #supermegafoxyawesomehot #totally-awesome #voldemort #wise-words

Rule number four for me as a writer? Plotlines are like sharks: They either keep moving or they die. ~J.R. Ward ↗

— J.R. Ward

#tips #writing #funny

Finding the book was like kissing a lightning bolt. ↗

— Karen Miller

#funny #humor #funny

Shut. Up," June squealed. "You have a date with that guy?" She giggled and covered her mouth. "Shut up, shut up, shut up! Tell me everything." "I can't do both," I pointed out. ↗

— Robin Benway

#funny

There was this funny thing of anything could happen now that we realized everything had. ↗

— Raymond Carver

#life #misery #funny

Try not to trip," she added. "We don't have time for a concussion today." I groaned. That would be just like me - ruin everything, destroy the world, in a moment of klutziness. ↗

— Stephenie Meyer

#bella-swan #funny #new-moon #twilight-saga #funny

People keep asking "Jacob or Edward?" when the really important question is "Diamond Dave or Sammy? ↗

— Ysabeau S. Wilce

#twilight #van-halen #funny

Strawberries are so red they make me feel 33% patriotic. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#humor #funny

If a problem can be solved, there is nothing to worry about. If it can't be solved, well you can always buy chocolate :) ↗

— Pablo

#funny #funny

Cut the crap and tell me what color panties you’re wearing. ↗