#funny

Why were you watching me change?" I explain. "Uh, 'cause I'm a guy?" He flips the pillow and slaps it, fluffing it. Then he rolls over and closes his eyes again. ↗

— Miranda Kenneally

#change

I was going to change my clothes, but I changed my mind instead. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #mind #change

When people try and change you for the better, you should let them. That way when you remain the same person despite everything, it can’t be said that you have no one to blame but yourself. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #identity #sameness #change

You don’t offend me. At least not until I change my name. Once I change it to Asshole, then I might be offended you keep calling me Jarod. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #offend #change

I would be an organ donor, but I’d much rather donate a piano. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#humor #organ-donor #piano #change

Sonya's a real person, like your Mother. Thirty years ago, that was your Mother's biggest flaw in my eyes, and now that's the thing I love most about Sonya. It's funny how things end, isn't it? ↗

— Matthew Norman

#funny

The atmosphere is always very grave when I walk into a cemetery. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #grave #humor #change

The difference between me and a scientist is a little word called “Science.” I don’t believe in it. Science has yet to validate my disbelief in Bigfoot. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #science #change

Leadership is being the first egg in the omelet. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #leadership #omelet #change

It's funny, because my last record was a lot about isolation and people living in separate worlds that other people can't even understand, which drug addiction is the perfect negative example of. ↗

— Aimee Mann

#addiction #because #even #example #funny