#funny

All human males were as fascinated with cars as they were with breasts. ↗

— Anita Clenney

#awaken-the-highland-warrior #breasts #bree #cars #faelan

Shouts of dismay rose as the red flesh splattered against the table. It was only a tomato, but one would think I was pulping a decaying heart by the noise the big, strong FIB officers were making. ↗

— Kim Harrison

#rachel #funny

My father was always a straight-up funny guy. He was silly. He was my inspiration. ↗

— Mike Myers

#father #funny #funny guy #guy #inspiration

If you’re going to hold a grudge, at least put on an oven mitt before you pick it up.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #funny #grudge #hold-a-grudge #humor

I frequently observe that one pretty face would be followed by five and thirty frights. ↗

— Jane Austen

#girls #humor #mean #ugly #funny

It was like hiking into a Hemingway story; everything was sepia-toned and bristling with subtext. ↗

— Leslie What

#hermit #literature #simile #wilderness #funny

How do you know you are who you are? How do you know you’re not simply a clone of who you think you are? ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #identity #funny

My theory is that all of Scottish cuisine is based on a dare. ↗

— Mike Myers

#based #cuisine #dare #scottish #theory

Europe is scooters. Europe is five young people on one bench sharing a chocolate bar. Their idea of entertainment and fun is so much different than ours, which is exactly why a movie about them would be funny. ↗

— Mike Myers

#bar #bench #chocolate #different #entertainment

Who's your daddy?' Myrnin stared at him as if he'd gone completely mental. 'Excuse me? ↗

— Rachel Caine

#funny #humor #myrnin #rachel-caine #shane-collins