#funny

Funny,’ Will said, as they picked their way through. ‘Things are absolutely awful and yet people look much happier than usual. Look at them all. Bubbling.’ ‘They are English,’ Merriman said. ‘Quite right,’ said Will’s father. ‘Splendid in adversity, tedious when safe. Never content, in fact. We’re an odd lot…. ↗

— Susan Cooper

#humour #the-dark-is-rising #truism #funny

Comfortable: relaxed, secure, and in content...It's funny how even the word brings some comfort. We've all experienced it. It's a safe feeling, pure happiness, or emptiness. It's hard to find the right medium & how long you can sustain being uncomfortable. I am a firm believer though that until you let yourself be truly uncomfortable, you can't reap the joys of being truly comfortable. ↗

— Shayna Sandlan

#funny

Pastors are starting to get wily. When people tell my friend, 'I'm not being fed,' he replies, 'I'm prefectly happy to spoon feed my one-year-old. But if I'm still spoon-feeding him when he's five, we've got a problem. Here's a fork. Feed yourself. ↗

— Jon Acuff

#christians #funny #inspirational #spiritual-growth #funny

If you’re at the bar trying to pick up women, remember: bend at the knees. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#humor #women #funny

I want to be the mayor of a small town. A small town I populated entirely with my seed. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#humor #mayor #populated #town #funny

You'll see. I have a collection of fine waistcoats and a handsome face." He stepped back to let her take in the full effect of both and her smile spread to the edge of a laugh. ↗

— Meljean Brook

#funny

The book “Little Women,” what, is that about midgets? I freaking love midgets. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #funny

I’m running a marathon. I won’t be jogging, walking, or sprinting, but I will be overseeing it. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#humor #marathon #running #funny

I'm good at blowjob. ↗

— Lauren Baker

#erotic #finding-home #funny-humor #sex #funny

Scully-' 'I screwed up.' Her hands again. 'Damnit, I screwed up.' 'Nope' [Mulder] said... 'If I was dead, then you would have screwed up.' She saw the grin. 'Then I'd have to haunt you.' 'Mulder that's not funny.' 'But you don't believe in ghosts and goblins... ↗

— Charles Grant

#funny