#funny

Society is so short on honest women who are comfortable with looking older as they remain thirty-nine. But there is no scarcity of women who are shamelessly exceeding thirty-nine as they continue to look nineteen. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #humor #women #age

I make love like farm equipment—not to farm equipment. There is a difference, though my cousin can’t tell it.
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— Dark Jar Tin Zoo

#farm #farm-equipment #funny #humor #love

We made love like two people trying to make love like three people in the trunk of a car.
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— Dark Jar Tin Zoo

#humor #love #sex #age

My love is sticky, like glue. I'd kill a horse just to give you some.
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— Dark Jar Tin Zoo

#glue #horse #humor #love #age

I was shameless in my supermarket-shelf mass-market taste. I loved King, Evanovich, Grisham and Brown. I won't lie; the oficial-looking filing cabinet in the corner is actually stuffed full of my paperbacks. ↗

— Molly Harper

#art

Get me outa here. F*ckin' creepy cheerleaders. ↗

— Lisa McMann

#funny #humor #lisa-mcmann #wake #dreams

The attitude that nature is chaotic and that the artist puts order into it is a very absurd point of view, I think. All that we can hope for is to put some order into ourselves ↗

— Willem de Kooning

#attitude

It's early on a beautiful winter morning. The house is quiet. The sun is shining. I'm thankful. I'm happy. My cup runneth over. Now there's coffee everywhere. ↗

— Mindy Levy

#comedy #funny #humor #beauty

Jeez, you’re strong.” And you, Sam, are a conversational reject. ↗

— Anne Tenino

#sam #funny

I did want adventure. I didn’t want to prescribe Ritalin to ADHD kids and tell fat old men to get more exercise. I wanted to go to the heart of Africa. Cradling villages of starving, disease-ridden children. Reserving no luxuries for myself. We would share everything: “Here. This syringe is dirty. Careful.” Engaging the deadliest disease of all. The AIDS virus. The beauty of it’s DNA sequence, to be so extraordinarily complex without sacrificing elegance. The mystery. The danger. The romance as it waltzes with my white blood cells inside me. “Give it to me. Inject it,” I’d say. To be destroyed so efficiently. But I settled for less. ↗

— Benson Bruno

#funny #medicine #beauty