#hum

Oh, come now, Manon,” Ilyse laughed, “It’s my job to liven things up a bit, too. I can’t let you and your dimples have all the fun. ↗

— Melika Dannese Lux

#friendship #humor #ilyse-charpentier #teasing #friendship

I want to spend less time talking about myself, and more time listening to what other people have to say about me. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #listening #myself #selfish

My Zora senses are tingling," I said. Nathan looked at me blankly. "Right, you don't know anything about Spiderman," I remembered. "Spider who?" he asked. ↗

— Markelle Grabo

#fantasy #friendship #humor #friendship

Friendship is like putting butter on your socks before you slide them on. Sure, we all do it occasionally, but most of us would rather eat breakfast bare-handed at least once in a while. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#butter #food #friendship #funny #humor

Sometimes I wish Jim Morrison were still alive, because I'd love to see a concert in which "The Doors" opened up for "The Cars. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #jim-morrison #music #musicians

Girls are so much nicer than men (apart from Tom-but homosexual). ↗

— Helen Fielding

#humor #love #truth #friendship

You know what i can't understand? You have all these people telling you all the time how great you are, smart and funny and talented and all that, i mean endlessly, i've been telling you for years. So why don't you believe it? why do you think people say that stuff, Em? Do you think it's a conspiracy, people secretly ganging up to be nice about you? ↗

— David Nicholls

#inspirational #funny

The only time I really think is when I smoke, and I quit smoking years ago. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#humor #quit #smoking #thinking #funny

The only reason my wife agreed to marry me is because Christian Bale wasn’t around to propose to her. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #marriage #wife #funny

I want to upholster the inside lining of my nostrils with leather, to have that "new car smell" all the time. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #leather #new-car-smell #strange