#humor

Earrings are like orgasms. You can never have too many." " I never thought about it quite that way." Well, you're a man. " She gave his knee a friendly pat. ↗

— Nora Roberts

#dreams

The floor is solid metal in some places and metal grating in others. Everything smells like rotting garbage and fire. "Don't say I never took you anywhere nice," Peter says. "Wouldn't dream of it," I say. ↗

— Veronica Roth

#humor #dreams

Cortez looked like someone newly in love, the way only twenty-four-year-olds can look. ↗

— Stieg Larsson

#love #humor

Can we get back to work now?" Haley asked, sounding innocent, but Zoe didn't miss the woman's lips twitching or the humor sparkling in her eyes. Something told her that this woman truly enjoyed torturing her husband. "For god sake's, my little grasshopper, you love the Yankees more than I do! What the hell is going on?" He turned accusing eyes on Zoe. "How dare you brainwash my wife?" he hissed. "A re you going to leave so that we can get some work done?" Haley demanded, turning her attention to the computer. "No," he said stubbornly, folding his arms over his chest, glaring at them. "Buttercream frosting," Haley said softly, never taking her eyes away from her computer screen. Jason licked his lips as he looked his pregnant wife over hungrily. "Tonight?" he croaked out. "If you're good," Haley said, with a small shrug. "But you have to leave-" "Bye," Jason said quickly, cutting her off and rushing out of the trailer just as fast as he came. ↗

— R.L. Mathewson

#jason #perfection #rl-mathewson #zoe #humor

If your dreams seem to be drifting away, wake up! ↗

— Benny Bellamacina

#life #philosophy #wisdom #dreams

Too many people spend money they haven't earned, to buy things they don't want, to impress people they don't like ↗

— Will Smith

#humor

The urge to change my mind and not go at all is enormous. I’m absolutely terrified to leave on that boat. But, if I don’t go, there’ll be one more broken person in this world who gave up a dream to sit in a chair, pick up the TV remote and shrink. ↗

— Lexis De Rothschild

#cats #chick-lit #humor #kindle #literary-collections

One will abide, and will confess that another is nobler than he, that another is richer, more handsome, and even that he is more learned, but that another is richer in reason scarcely any will confess: Rare is he who will concede genius. ↗

— Sor Juana Inés de la Cruz

#humor #intelligence #dreams

I heard a song I hate and I thought of her. Ah, such is love.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#humor #love #music #relationships #song

He was one of your wicked, fascinating men. After he got married he left off being fascinating and just kept on being wicked. ↗

— L.M. Montgomery

#matter-of-fact #dreams