#humorous

Oh my God! You little slut! You want to have a good date with him and want to have ten thousand of his little baseball babies! Cassie!!! ↗

— J. Sterling

#humorous-quotations #dating

My father had bought him a shirt that said “Sure you can date my daughter.  In a completely unrelated topic, have you seen my shotgun? ↗

— Tara Sivec

#dating

And if anyone asks, you're Chinese. The boy had nodded. "Chinese," he whispered. "I'm Chinese." "And I," said the girl, "am the Queen of Spain." "In your dreams," said the boy. "In my dreams," said the girl, "I'm the King. ↗

— Julie Otsuka

#thought-provoking #dreams

How bad could things be if my hair was neat? ↗

— Jeff Lindsay

#dreams

Chip did not believe in having a shock drawer or a T-shirt drawer. He believed that all drawers were created equal and each with whatever fit. ↗

— John Green

#equality

Your ma's dating?" Tim looks shocked. "I thought she pretty much confined herself to a vibrator and the shower nozzle since your dad screwed her over. ↗

— Huntley Fitzpatrick

#dating

If sex were food, Rhage would haven been morbidly obese. ↗

— J.R. Ward

#food

O Lord! he concluded, forgive all these trespasses. Lead me not into Penn Station. ↗

— Saul Bellow

#forgiveness

Never call anyone a baboon unless you are sure of your facts. ↗

— Will Cuppy

#apes #humor #humorous #mammals #primates

As soon as a friendship passed a certain point - some obscure and secret boundary - a woman quite automatically became overwhelmed by a raging compulsion to complicate things. ↗

— David Eddings

#women #friendship