#humour

Tact: the ability to tell a man he's open-minded when he has a hole in his head. ↗

— F. G. Kernan

#humour #tact #humor

I learned early and at that kitchen table that there are ways of avoiding, without guilt, the commitments of love. ↗

— P.D. James

#humor #humour #love #theo #humor

Your king is SUPPOSED to explode? What kind of government system is that? ↗

— Jefferson Smith

#government #humor #humour #kings #monarchy

What the hell are you doing here? You weren't on the guest list. Hell, you people aren't on anybody's guest list. If you turned up at a funeral, the corpse would walk out on you. ↗

— Simon R. Green

#humour #humor

Sleepwalking is the perfect exorcise for lazy people ↗

— Benny Bellamacina

#humor #humour #life #philosophy #sports

I didn't feel strong. I felt like a big ball of wuss that wanted to curl up in my bed and never get out. ↗

— Diane Castle

#humorous #humour #humor

On peut rire de tout mais pas avec n'importe qui. ↗

— Coluche

#humor #humour #religion #humor

It's surprising what you can fail to achieve if you really put your mind to it. ↗

— Peter James West

#inspirational

Never put off until tomorrow, what you can put off until next week. ↗

— Peter James West

#inspirational

Hey. Sometimes life is a shit flavored Popsicle. ↗

— Carl Hiaasen

#life