#humour

I took a deep breath. "I'm sorry I lied, I like your Star Wars sheets, you're not that bad of a driver, and I swear on my Very Cherry lip gloss that I will never lie to you again. ↗

— Gemma Halliday

#humour #humor

Not going to walk me to the door?" I asked, pretending to be shocked at his lack of gallantry. "Of course I am. many would think that a bonny lass such as yerself wouldst be able to stay out of trouble for a distance of fifteen feet, but I know better." "Did you just use the words yerself and wouldst in the same sentence? You can't be a pirate and a courtier at the same time, Dev. It just isn't done. ↗

— Jennifer Lynn Barnes

#humor #humour #humor

I can't forget things, or ignore them-bad things that happen," I said. "I'm a lay-it-all-out person, a dwell-on-it person, an obsess-about-it person. If I hold things in and try to forget or pretend, I become a madman and have panic attacks. I have to talk. ↗

— E. Lockhart

#girls #humor #humorous #humour #humor

When danger reared its ugly head, He bravely turned his tail and fled. ↗

— Graham Chapman

#humour #sir-robin #humor

No one messes around with a nerd’s computer and escapes unscathed. ↗

— E.A. Bucchianeri

#computer-hackers #computers #funny #geek #geek-humor

Indeed. ↗

— Teal'c (Stargate SG-

#humour #indeed #sf #sg #humor

John, let me make one thing clear,” Jim said, cutting me off in his most stern, evangelical voice. “Every man is blessed with his gifts from the Lord. One of mine happens to be a penis large enough that, if it had a penis of its own, my penis’ penis would be larger than your penis.”..... ..."Fuck all of you,” John retorted. “You don’t even exist. We’re all just a figment of my cock’s imagination. ↗

— David Wong

#hilarity #humour #penises #stupid-boys #imagination

mystery is not founded in ignorance, mystery is founded in imagination ↗

— S. Spencer Baker

#ignorance #imagination #mystery #imagination

Another strike of lightening – now accompanied by the deep-bellied rumble, and the horse reared, incidentally setting Henry very picturesquely against the inconstant moon. Alas, Catherine was deeply engaged in her argument with Old Edric and this missed entirely the melodramatic display. But we may assume that, possessing so strong an imagination, Catherine had often pictured Henry thus... ↗

— Emily C.A. Snyder

#jane-austen #nachtsturm-castle #northanger-abbey #imagination

love, stupidity and imagination have no limits ↗

— SANDEEP

#imagination