#humour

You make a good point,' Fletcher conceded. 'See, there's a reason why you're the girl and I'm the boy. You think about things while I...' 'Don't?' 'Exactly,' he said happily. ↗

— Derek Landy

#death

She recalled him as a forceful and witty speaker with a ready repartee and a penetrating voice. He had once, for example, put down a spokesman for the pesticide industry with a remark that people still quoted at parties: "And I presume on the eighth day God called you and said, 'I changed my mind about insects! ↗

— John Brunner

#pesticides #pollution #change

Communist until you get rich; feminist until you get married; atheist until the airplane starts falling. ↗

— The Hypocrite Diaries

#human-nature #humour #hypocrisy #change

Horses frighten me as much as chickens do,’ he said. ‘That is too bad, because lack of communication with horses has impeded human progress,’ said Abrenuncio. ‘If we ever broke down the barriers, we could produce the centaur. ↗

— Gabriel Garcí­a Márquez

#chickens #horses #humour #communication

You don't need a big pen to write a tall story ↗

— Benny Bellamacina

#life #philosophy #quotes #wisdom #life

Do you think ladies’ eyebrows can communicate as well?” she asked. “No, they don’t have sufficient thicketry,” he said with authority. “Thicketry?” “Yes, that is the official term. ↗

— Anne Gracie

#historical-romance #humour #romance #communication

Frank couldn't breathe underwater. But where was he? Percy turned in a full circle. Nothing. Then he glanced up. Hovering above him was a giant goldfish. Frank had turned -clothes, backpack, and all- into a koi the size of a teen-aged boy. "dude." Percy sent his thoughts through the water, the way he spoke to other sea creatures. "A goldfish?" Frank's voice came back to him: "I freaked. We were talking about goldfish, so it was on my mind. Sue me. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#goldfish #humour #koi #percy-jackson #age

The shock of photographed atrocities wears off with repeated viewings, just as the surprise and bemusement felt the first time one sees a pornographic movie wear off after one sees a few more. ↗

— Susan Sontag

#photography #pornography #movies

Oh—and you need to work on making my opinion more important than Josh’s, too. I know it’s a stretch—he’s your most intimate relationship to date, but when you’re balls deep in my ass, I’d prefer you not be wondering if it counts as a workout. ↗

— Amy Lane

#dating

I’ll always be your friend,” he said. “Your best friend, if you let me. But I want to be your lover, too.” He groaned and shifted in his chair. “Soon. I want to be that soon.” Then a look came over him. “Oh Gina…I didn’t even court you! God, I should date you first before I beg you to take off your clothes! ↗

— Robyn Carr

#funny #humour #romance #romantic #dating