#random

I like to do chill things on dates. I think it would be fun to go to the zoo. I know it's really weird and random, but I love animals. It'd be like a day of doing silly things, while enjoying nature. ↗

— Ashlee Simpson

#dates #day #doing #enjoying #fun

Surviving cancer is cool, but surviving old age is cooler.
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— Jarod Kintz

#awesome #bizarre #cancer #funny #humor

A blanket could be used to represent my feelings for you. I think it’s slightly more communicative than me giving you a scrap of paper with a doodle of an erect penis. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

I miss Agatha like green misses yellow and blue. She made me who I am. If not for her I’d probably be burnt orange right now. If orange is the color of fire, what is burnt orange? Is that like burning fire? How do you burn something that is itself fire? That’s like asking how do you kill death? ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#random #death

A brick and a blanket need a logo, and I’m just the designer to hire to sit around idly as I ideally charge you by the hour.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

The main thing I'm into is going about on a bike, taking random routes; I'm really into the idea of making up journeys, and just seeing where they take you, because they always end up taking you someplace freaky. ↗

— Tom Jenkinson

#always #because #bike #end #freaky

It's a lot of random situations that combine in a certain volatile form and create a bigger-than- the-whole situation that nobody could have predicted. ↗

— Paul Kantner

#combine #could #create #form #lot

Dave and I had been song writers in Nashville, trying to get around, out hustling, trying to meet people. We randomly met Hillary out in town one night. She said she was a singer. I asked her if she would like to write some songs with Dave and me, and a week later she came over. Instantaneously we had this chemistry. ↗

— Charles Kelley

#asked #been #came #chemistry #dave

Several famous people have licked my nipples. Well, indirectly. First they licked the stamps, and then I peeled them off the letters and stuck them on my nipples.
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— Jarod Kintz

#celebrity #fame #funny #humor #letter

How many types of curtains can there be? When I asked the salesman this, he banged on the organ and bellowed with laughter. But I saw those feet fidgeting. He just didn't know. ↗

— Benson Bruno

#humor #random #funny