#sarcastic

I once told a journalist that girls call me 'Kitten,' but I couldn't have been more sarcastic, and no matter how many times I've said that it was a joke, it still doesn't go away. ↗

— Joaquin Phoenix

#been #call #go #go away #how

It's fun to be sarcastic, but now I'm able to express myself in a way that's much more sincere. ↗

— Christina Ricci

#express #fun #i #more #much

I feel your scorn, and I accept it. ↗

— Jon Stewart

#humor

Writers don't get mad they get even in their novels. ↗

— Candace C. Bowen

#humor-quotes #humorous-quotes #quotes #sarcastic-quotes #witty-quotes

And I’ll wager you thought him the handsomest thing that ever you saw in your life.” “I did. And if you stuck him, and stuffed him, and hung him on the wall, I’d be very glad to admire him. But in life he’s an arrogant pig, and I didn’t care for him at all. ‘Mind who you look at, wench.’ Foo! ↗

— Diane Stanley

#beauty #sarcastic-humor #beauty

Marriage is the chief cause of divorce. ↗

— Groucho Marx

#humor

Caroline's lips thinned, her face flushed. "My husband, sir, has more secrets in his tiny, insignificant mind than the entire British War Department has had on file since its inception." She huffed with pure, disgusted outrage, lowering her gaze to the floor to murmur, "I'll kill him. ↗

— Adele Ashworth

#husband-and-wife #sarcastic #funny

So, you're telling me the zoo commissioned you to make a zombie panda in order to avoid a potential international incident. ↗

— Lish McBride

#necromancer #panda #sarcastic #zombie #humor

I paused for a moment, debating whether to turn and look what was happening. My senses told me Obo’s presence was still at my side, and turning my face into the barrel of a gun seemed like an ill-advised way to cap off this day of monumentally stupid decisions. ↗

— M.A. George

#paranormal-romance #sarcastic-humor #stupid-decisions #humor

Guys like him? They were the worst kind. All looks and no heart. Guys not like him? They were all deceiving, freaking asshats. ↗

— Rucy Ban

#love #passion #sarcastic #sexy #witty