#tire

When my TV show, 'Sports Jobs with Junior Seau,' assigned me to be a 'Sports Illustrated' reporter for a weekend, I didn't realize I'd have to squeeze it in around another sports job. I had planned to retire from the NFL to enjoy the cushy lifestyle of a full-time reality TV star, but I wound up getting run over by a bull. ↗

— Junior Seau

#around #assigned #bull #enjoy #full-time

Mostly I sit at home in the evenings watching the box and hoping that one day I'll evolve into plankton. ↗

— Tom Holt

#office #tired #work #life

The Greatest Generation got to save old tires, dig a Victory Garden and forgo sugar. The Richest Generation is being asked to shop. ↗

— Margaret Carlson

#being #dig #forgo #garden #generation

The tire left a skid mark on the road that looked like a mustache. So I shaved it off the pavement, stuffed it in my trunk, and took it home to wear to work the next day. Ah, but that’s life, no?
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#day #life #mustache #nonsense #pavement

After we deal and heal...NOT A A SHRED OF EVIDENCE EXISTS THAT LIFE IS SERIOUS .....Jan Marshall ↗

— Jan Marshall

#healing #humor #satire #seniors #survival

Books that have become classics - books that have had their day and now get more praise than perusal - always remind me of retired colonels and majors and captains who, having reached the age limit, find themselves retired on half pay. ↗

— Thomas Bailey Aldrich

#always #become #books #captains #classics

Marriage is the legal method devised to end love without pain. ↗

— Tom Morrison

#romance #satire #stock-market #love

Some men are born sodomites, some achieve sodomy, and some have sodomy thrust upon them... ↗

— Aleister Crowley

#satire #sodomy #men

But that's men all over ... Poor dears, they can't help it. They haven't got logical minds. ↗

— Dorothy L. Sayers

#logic #logical-thinking #men #satire #men

It was ironic, but when you scratched the surface, most successful men were working for one thing only--to retire--and the sooner the better. Whereas women were the complete opposite. She had never heard a woman say she was working so she could retire to a desert island or to live on a boat. It was probably, she thought, because most women didn't think they deserved to do nothing. ↗

— Candace Bushnell

#retire #success #women #working #men