#funeral

They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days. ↗

— Garrison Keillor

#days #few #funerals #going #i

The accumulation of birthdays is the leading cause of death in the United States and other large land masses. Now while that may not be 100% accurate, it is at least 88% accurate. Actually, the last sentence itself might not have been 100% accurate, but I’m 88% sure it was. Maybe I should just brush up on fractions and percentages before making statements that are liable to hurt the funeral industry, because if birthdays aren’t killing people then it’s bad for the mortality business. And if you can’t trust somebody to die, then you can’t trust somebody. But I’m somebody you can trust. I’m at least 88% trustworthy, at least 88% of the time. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#accurate #birthday #death #die #fractions

Perhaps because it seems so appropriate, I don't notice the rain. It falls in sheets, a blanket of silvery thread rushing to the hard almost-winter ground. Still, I stand without moving at the side of the coffin. ↗

— Michelle Zink

#coffins #death #funerals #rainy-day #death

I remembered back to leo's burial and holding your hand. I was eleven and you were six, your hand soft and small in mine. As the vicar said 'in sure and certain hope of the resurrection of eternal life' you turned to me, 'I don't want sure and certain hope I want sure and certain Bee. ↗

— Rosamund Lupton

#funeral #hope #sisters #death

The point is that no matter what you choose to do with your body when you die, it won't, ultimately, be very appealing. If you are inclined to donate yourself to science, you should not let images of dissection or dismemberment put you off. They are no more or less gruesome, in my opinion, than ordinary decay or the sewing shut of your jaws via your nostrils for a funeral viewing. ↗

— Mary Roach

#dissection #funeral #science #science

Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours. ↗

— Yogi Berra

#come #funerals #go #other #otherwise

An obituary should be an exercise in contemporary history, not a funeral oration. ↗

— Peter Utley

#contemporary history #exercise #funeral #history #obituary

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it. ↗

— Mark Twain

#approved #attend #funeral #i #letter

Rome - the city of visible history, where the past of a whole hemisphere seems moving in funeral procession with strange ancestral images and trophies gathered from afar. ↗

— George Eliot

#ancestral #city #funeral #gathered #hemisphere

I wanted to make a human monster. His name is Coffin Baby. The idea is based on a group of people from Pasadena whose names I can't mention. His mother died and during the funeral, this baby came out of her in the coffin. ↗

— Tobe Hooper

#based #came #coffin #died #during