#funny

That really was NOT fun, though. Well, the hitting-her-with-a-stick part, that was fun. But crashing into a concrete bear? NOT fun. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#funny

Rule #1: Always test your sexual prowess on state workers first. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#sexual-prowess #funny

I want to make pants out of tuna fish, to accompany my cottage cheese thighs. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#fat #funny #pants #tuna-fish #funny

Love is two souls occupying one bed. Though not a bunk bed. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#love #funny

Travis: The Aphrodite kids were ripping each other’s clothes and throwing lipstick and jewellery. It was like a rabid herd of wild Bratz. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#pranks #travis-barker #funny

I’ve come to ask you where Seth is.” "Funny,” said Andrea. “We were going to ask you the same thing.” I was taken aback. “How would I know?” They both just stared. "I don’t! ↗

— Richelle Mead

#georgina-kincaid #terry-mortensen #funny

She called me ‘my lady,’ ” she told him in a plaintive voice. “I don’t know who that is. I’m no lady.” The last of his fury faded away to be replaced with a quick gleam. He peered under the sheet. “I can attest to that. ↗

— Thea Harrison

#funny #pia #funny

I said, names aren't important," he repeated. There was a silence between them for some seconds, then the Ranger said: "Do you know what is important?" Will shook his head. "Supper is important! ↗

— John Flanagan

#halt #supper #funny

Halt eyed them balefully. They were all being so obvious about not mentioning his sudden reappearance that it was even worse than if they had commented on it... 'Oh, go on!' he said. 'Somebody say something! I know what you're thinking!' 'It's good to see you up and about, Halt,' Selethen said gravely... Halt glared at the others and they quickly chorused their pleasure at seeing him back to his normal self. But he could see the grins they didn't quite manage to hide. He fixed a glare on Alyss. 'I'm surprised at you Alyss,' he said. 'I expected no better of Will and Evanlyn, of course. Heartless beasts, the pair of them. But you! I thought you had been better trained!'... 'Halt, I'm sorry! It's not funny, you're right... Shut up, Will.' This last was directed at Will as he tried, unsuccessfully, to smother a snigger. ↗

— John Flanagan

#evanlyn #halt #laughter #ranger-s-apprentice #seasickness

He told me that if you yelled out "JAMBA!" at full volume, all the employees would yell back "JUICE!" He lied. ↗

— Morgan Matson

#brother #charlie #funny #funny