#funny

It's funny how intimate it feels to get a text. ↗

— Sophie Ellis Bextor

#funny #get #how #intimate #text

I’ve seen daggers pierce the chest, Children dying in the road, Crawling things hooked and baited, Rapists bound and then castrated, Villains singed in public square. Yet none these sights did make me cringe Like when my Love cut all her hair. ↗

— Roman Payne

#fashion #funny-quotes #girls #hair #hair-drama

It's funny how sometimes how the public some people think I was born like this. That I maybe I sleep and I do big muscle, but its a lot of work to look like this and to be in this kind of condition. ↗

— Lou Ferrigno

#born #condition #funny #how #i

I auditioned for a solo in church and got it. I was about seven and I sang a song called, 'Jesus, I Heard You Had a Big House' and I remember people standing up at the end and me thinking, 'Oh, I think I'm going to like this.' That's how it all began. Sounds funny to say you got your start in church, but I did. ↗

— Kristin Chenoweth

#auditioned #began #big #big house #called

I had to audition for the part of Jnior, and I wanted the role terribly because I knew it was a great character. This guy is a wonderful, funny, mean old guy. ↗

— Dominic Chianese

#because #character #funny #great #great character

I had a dream about you. I was a ventriloquist trying to share your fashion secrets, but you wouldn’t talk. So we put on a strip show for the department store sale, and I was arrested for theft – I took away your dignity as a mannequin. ↗

— Bauvard

#dreams #funny #humor #life #relationships

It's funny, a lot of people think I take myself seriously because I come off so serious sometimes. But it's not that I take myself seriously, I take what I do seriously. ↗

— Laurence Fishburne

#come #funny #i #i do #lot

I had a dream about you. Are you surprised? You shouldn’t be. After all, it’s only fair I finally have a dream about you when you’ve been dreaming about me all these years. Oh please, don’t deny it. You couldn’t want my body more if I were a mannequin and you were a tailor making custom suits.
 ↗

— Dark Jar Tin Zoo

#dreams #funny #humor #life #relationships

I had a dream about you. Just as in real life, I was a man, and you were a mannequin. Well, in my dream you were a mannequin, but in real life you’re much less charismatic and talkative.
 ↗

— Dark Jar Tin Zoo

#dreams #funny #humor #life #relationships

I had a dream about you. You took control of my body and forced me to have sex with you. Then you called the cops, and the police said I raped you—but I was the one who was raped. If I had known you were that kind of person, I’d have never voted you into political office in the first place.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#dreams #funny #humor #life #relationships