#funny

There are many other little refinements too, Mr. Bohlen. You'll see them all when you study the plans carefully. For example, there's a trick that nearly every writer uses, of inserting at least one long, obscure word into each story. This makes the reader think that the man is very wise and clever. So I have the machine do the same thing. There'll be a whole stack of long words stored away just for this purpose." Where?" In the 'word-memory' section," he said, epexegetically. ↗

— Roald Dahl

#funny #humor #humour #funny

Incompetence in mathematics is no proof of brilliance. You must be ignorant of science and geography as well. That is the gold standard of American education. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #humor #ignorance #math #science

Night clubs are where Americans learn the laws of motion. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #humor #science #education

The amount of educational programming on television today is simply desensitizing. The only reason left to go to school is to see gun violence. ↗

— Bauvard

#education #funny #gun-violence #humor #television

A lot of brainless unicorns swaggering about and calling themselves educated just because they can push each other off a horse with a bit of a stick! It makes me tired. ↗

— T.H. White

#merlyn #the-once-and-future-king #education

The proudest confessions are always barely legal. The fondest memories are always underage. The most innocent experiences are always infantile. ↗

— Bauvard

#humor #illegality #memory #pedophilia #experience

I’m a firm believer in equality at all times—” “At all times?” She glanced at the cuffs clipped to his leathers. “Why do I find that hard to believe?” And why the heck was she arguing with him. Mine, mine, mine. “At all times,” he repeated. “However, in the bedroom or in the club, I am a lot more equal than you. ↗

— Cherise Sinclair

#erotic-romance #funny #humour #romance #equality

The wider you spread your fingers apart while clapping is equal to the amount of retarded you look while clapping. ↗

— Christy Leigh Stewart

#clapping #funny #funny-and-random #retarded #equality

It was safe to assume he'd not only read the play but then re-read it, cross-referenced the annotations, and probably joined an online chat group called Buds of the Bard or something equally nerdy ↗

— Simon Holt

#simon-holt #soulstice #equality

The last dictator will finally prove the phrase, 'love conquers all.' Our savior is an erotocrat with an expansionist policy. When we are equalized through hierarchy, we will languish in joy. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #love #salvation #truisms #war