#funny

It's funny, but you get to a time in your life when you think you have all the friends you will ever have. ↗

— Liam Neeson

#friends #funny #get #life #think

Never raise your hand to your children - it leaves your midsection unprotected. ↗

— Robert Orben

#children #hand #leaves #never #raise

I suppose the latest thing is to sit back and let Mr. Nobody from Nowhere make love to your wife. ↗

— F. Scott Fitzgerald

#funny-quotes #gatsby #love #sarcasm #tom

I don't really need to be dirty to be funny. ↗

— Jimmy Kimmel

#funny #i #need #really

We sat down and told stories that happened to us in our childhood, to our children. They were all basically based on the truth. These stories were funny and poignant to us. They just took off. These are all stories from my life. ↗

— Howie Mandel

#basically #childhood #children #down #funny

It's because you aren't thinking very clearly tonight." "I know. Being Drunk is weird." "Oh my god. I love you so much. Especially when you say stuff like that." "Like what?" "Nothing. Never mind. Although I'm dying to know why your shoe is green. ↗

— Jessica Sorensen

#drunk #funny #green #shoe #funny

Anyone who is considered funny will tell you, sometimes without even your asking, that deep inside they are very serious, neurotic, introspective people. ↗

— Wendy Wasserstein

#humanity-complexity #humor #mind #funny

As you know it is a comedy so everything is a little bit pushed. That's what's funny about this kind of movie is you can laugh about the absurdity, and the bad side of life. ↗

— Sophie Marceau

#absurdity #bad #bit #comedy #everything

My uncle is so funny - Don Vito. He was always fat with the craziest voice. Dude, he barely speaks English; it's just full-blown jibber-jabber. It's so funny to watch on TV because you really need subtitles because you can't understand him. ↗

— Bam Margera

#barely #because #craziest #dude #english

I think it would be funny if some guy walked into a house and said he just stepped in shit. Then he’d ask other people to look at the bottom of his shoes as he lifted each leg and foot so they could see. When all the people said no, they didn't see any shit, he would then take off his shoes and there would be shit all over his socks. Then the guy would say, "Oh, God, my roommate shit in my boot again. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#roommate #stepped-in-shit #funny