#funny

I'm way hot," he muttered. "But I don't feel sick. Just — way hot." Fang ↗

— James Patterson

#funny #funny

Sex and violence: the greatest duo since the Three Stooges. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#sex #three-stooges #violence #funny

So you're here by yourself?" “Yes." “Seems like an odd place to come by yourself." “I needed to get away." “Woman trouble? That's another of my father's expressions." “No, actually. I poisoned my neighbor's dogs." After a moment she said, “How drunk are you?" “Quite." “Is that true?" “What?" “That you poisoned your neighbor’s dogs." “I’m afraid it is." “I have dogs." “Well, keep them away from me. ↗

— David Gilmour

#funny #death

A man's got to take a lot of punishment to write a really funny book. ↗

— Ernest Hemingway

#funny #got #lot #man #punishment

I love Nudge, Nudge is a great kid, but that motormouth of hers could have turned Mother Teresa into an ax murderer ↗

— James Patterson

#experience

When I was a kid, there was no distinction between a movie about old people or young people. It was either funny or not. It was either entertaining or not. It was either exciting or not. It was either thrilling or not. ↗

— Joseph Bologna

#between #distinction #either #entertaining #exciting

So to me, Texas Hold 'em puts me to sleep. At least when you play stud, you can be funny as you deal. Somebody some day is going to come up with a Stud show that's going to work. ↗

— Joseph Bologna

#day #deal #funny #going #hold

When the sun comes up, I have morals again. ↗

— Elayne Boosler

#again #comes #i #morals #sun

I've thought for the last decade or so, the only actual place raw truth was seeping through in newspapers was on the Comics Pages. They were able to pull off intelligent social comment, pure truths not found elsewhere in the news pages, and had the ability to make it all funny, entertaining, and pertinent. ↗

— Elayne Boosler

#able #actual #comics #comment #decade

I value comedy. I value somebody who can be funny. ↗

— James L. Brooks

#funny #i #somebody #value #who