#humor

Have you ever tried to bribe a Korathi priest, Lukel?" Shuden asked pointedly. Lukel looked around uncomfortably. "I'd rather not answer that question, thank you. ↗

— Brandon Sanderson

#humor

We are not really spying, we're just satisfying our curiosity. ↗

— Paul Christopher

#humor

Writing is my life. Life is my hobby. ↗

— Emma Lai

#writing-life #humor

I have the body of an 18-year-old, but it's in the trunk of my car and it's starting to smell. ↗

— Kimberly Cheryl

#humor

Thank you sir," she said. "I hope that your friend feels better soon." I shrugged. "The ways of the Lord" I said, "are often dark, but never pleasant. ↗

— Robert B. Parker

#humor #religon #spenser #humor

Poetic simile was strictly limited to statements like 'his mighty steed was as fleet as the wind on a fairly calm day, say about Force Three,' and any loose talk about a beloved having a face that launched a thousand ships would have to be backed by evidence that the object of desire did indeed look like a bottle of champagne. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#humor

Did you hear what I was playing, Lane? I didn't think it polite to listen, sir. ↗

— Oscar Wilde

#music #humor

What is the secret of life?’ I asked. ‘I forget,’ said Sandra. ‘Protein,’ the bartender declared. ‘They found something out about protein.‘ ‘Yeah,’ said Sandra, ‘that’s it. ↗

— Kurt Vonnegut

#satire #humor

The man kisses me and I just hop right on him like he's the hottest new ride at Disneyland. ↗

— Karen Marie Moning

#humor #love #sex #humor

I mean, electric shock? Isn’t that a bit... electric shock-y? ↗

— Emmett Spain

#humor #london-city #urban-fantasy #vampire #humor