#humor

Everywhere's been where it is ever since it was first put there. It's called geography. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#humor #humour #humor

Sometimes I don't know whether I'm thening or nowing. ↗

— Jasper Fforde

#humor

Yes," I said. "My name is seven-five-nine-nine-three-nine-ex-dash-one. Junior. ↗

— James Patterson

#humor

Who's that little brunette?" Suzanne asked. "I hate little petite types. Gregory doesn't look right with someone petite. Little face, little hands, little dainty feet." "Big boobs," Beth said, glancing up. ↗

— Elizabeth Chandler

#gregory #humor #petite #suzanne #humor

Where are you going?” “To get a Coke!” “Would you—” “No! ↗

— Rachel Caine

#humor

I so rarely have the chance to field-test anything. Amelie is so conservative about these things -Myrnin ↗

— Rachel Caine

#humor #myrnin #humor

No. Haven’t you been listening?” Marcus would always remember that moment. It was to be the first time he would ever be faced with that most vexing of female quirks: the question that had nothing but wrong answers. ↗

— Julia Quinn

#humor

Oh, don't cough, Ernest. When one is dictating one should speak fluently and not cough. Besides, I don't know how to spell a cough. ↗

— Oscar Wilde

#humor

Goodness had nothing to do with it. ↗

— Mae West

#romance #humor

Oh noes, kitteh haz major angriez!” I said. I turned around to share a laugh with my companions and found them glaring at me. “What?” I asked. Leif shook a finger and said in a low, menacing tone, “If you tell me I have to talk like an illiterate halfwit to fit into this society, I will punch you.” “And I’ll pull out your goatee,” Gunnar added. “Lolcat iz new happeh wai 2 talk,” I explained to them. “U doan haz 2 be kitteh 2 speek it. ↗

— Kevin Hearne

#gunnar #humor #leif #humor