No subscription or hidden extras
Read through the most famous quotes by topic #humor
Max replies, "Why the fuck n- Oh man, are you gettin' lucky?" I quickly do up Asher's jeans and stand. Max bursts into laughter when he sees my head ascend and chuckles, "Shit, guys. Warn a brother. Did you at least finish?" Ash smiles big fluffling my hair, I tell Max, "I never start something I don't plan to finish." Ash wraps his arm around me and Max shakes his head. He says, "Well if you two don't mind, I think I'm gonna make this a blowjob free zone from now on. ↗
He raised his voice over the crowd’s roar and gestured to Cade’s phone. “Good news?” Cade tucked the phone back into his pocket. “She said yes.” Vaughn blinked—clearly having expected Cade to say something else—then threw out his hands. He had no clue what they were talking about, but right then everything was a cause for celebration. “She said yes! Hell, yeah!” He grabbed Huxley and pointed to Cade, shouting over the crowd. “She said yes.” “Sweet,” Huxley said, tapping his beer to Cade’s. “Who said yes?” “Brooke Parker. I’m seeing her tonight.” “Fuck you,” Vaughn said, somewhat in awe. “I knew it. You’ve been digging her from the moment she told you to shove your obstruction of justice threats up your ass.” “What can I say? I’m a sucker for the shy, quiet types. ↗
#love
Evan saw a man across the kitchen, butt leaning against the counter, muscular arms folded over his broad chest. His blond hair was cut very short, and his eyes were bright blue sparks. Evan’s gaze locked with Paul’s, and a sudden sense of vertigo swam through his head. The conversation in the other room, the back and forth between John and Alden, the startling brilliance of Bill’s teeth -- all of that faded away as Paul stared back at him. Evan found himself inside a strange bubble that blocked all outside stimuli. He had never experienced a connection this intense before, especially with an initial look, and even though it terrified him in a thrillingly sexual way, he didn’t dare pull his gaze away from Paul’s for fear of breaking the timeless moment between them. ↗
To this day, the behavior of straight men is something I’ve never been able to wrap my head around. Have you ever met one? They’re really weird. Sometimes they want to have sex without A Chorus Line playing in the background. Yuck. How is that even possible? ↗
What men always seem to ignore is that until Eve arrived, Adam didn't even have his own apartment. He'd never tasted beer, and there was no place to get a decent hamburger. He slept in the dirt, and was so oblivious he didn't even realize he was naked. Even worse, he didn't seem to notice that Eve was naked, either. ↗
#men
A brick could be used as gift for the man who has everything. Here’s a tip: that man doesn’t have everything, because I just stole his wallet. But I can’t very well give him a gift of something I’ve just grifted. So while he’s pondering the meaning of the brick as a present, I’m off spending his money. It’s win-win for both of us. And by both of us I mean me and you, not me and him, because naturally you’ll be my accomplice, my partner, and as such you’re entitled to half. Of half. But since I’m paying you 25%, you’re paying for dinner. ↗
#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny
