#humor

Of course. Because at the Gallagher Academy, "precautions" usually equals "voluntary shock therapy. ↗

— Ally Carter

#precautions #spies #equality

I believe that there is an equality to all humanity. We all suck. ↗

— Bill Hicks

#humour #misanthropy #perspective #equality

It seems only fair," Matthew continued. "A bit of karma, if you will." He twirled the stake again. "Shall we see how long you scream?" "Are you ever going to shut up?" I snapped, fear and irritation filling me in equal measures. "This isn't your monologue, Hamlet. It's the battle scene, in case you've forgotten." His eyes narrowed so fast they nearly sparked. They were the color of honey on fire. One of the others growled like an animal, low in his throat. It made all the hairs on my arms stand straight up. I was going to die for making fun of Shakespeare. My English Lit professor would be so proud. ↗

— Alyxandra Harvey

#shakespeare #equality

He didn't have a single clue what was going on with these two strangers, but every instinct told him Master George equaled good, Mistress Jane equaled bald- he blinked-uh, bad. ↗

— James Dashner

#good #humor #equality

Amelie said, “I won’t be your servant in Morganville. Nor should you be mine. Equals.” She offered her hand to him, and he looked down at it, clearly taken aback. But he took it. “Now defend what is ours, my partner.” He grinned … grinned! … and whirled to meet Myrnin in midleap as Myrnin attacked. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#eve-rosser #funny #ghost-town #humor #michael-glass

A woman's never too old to make an idiot of herself. It goes along with equality of the sexes and potty parity. ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#equality

As the saying goes: God made man and woman; Colonel Colt made them equal. ↗

— Ann Coulter

#politics #equality

I don't see why ogling same-sex kissing should be the exclusive domain of frat boys whacking off to lesbian action, that's so sexist. Feminism should be all inclusive- it should be about sexual liberation, equal pay for equal work, and the fundamental girl right of boy2boy appreciation. ↗

— Rachel Cohn

#sex #equality

What is the sound of one hand clapping? What is the weight of a single grain of sand? The answer is equal to my interest in the message you are about to leave so make it short. -- Mitch Hertzog's voice mail message. ↗

— Meg Cabot

#equality

In a werewolf pack, you cannot interfere with the mate choice of a clan fellow. You cannot intentionally harm that werewolf’s chosen mate. You are not, however, required to help that person should he find himself in a life - threatening situation. Somehow, Zeb had managed to stumble into several such situations in the few months since he ’d been engaged to Jolene. He’d had several hunting “accidents” while visiting the McClaine farm, even though he didn’t hunt. The brakes on his car had failed while he was driving home from the farm—twice. Also, a running chainsaw mysteriously fell on him from a hayloft. He would never get that pinkie toe back. ↗

— Molly Harper

#hunting #pinkie-toe #vampire #werewolf #dating