#random

The progression of roles you take strings together a portrait of an actor, but it's a completely random process. ↗

— Meryl Streep

#completely #portrait #process #progression #random

I don't write a great song every day. I don't write a great song every couple weeks. It comes in such random times. ↗

— Macklemore

#couple #day #every #every day #great

I'm Magnus Bane." he went on in a soothing tone, stretching out his ringed hands. Blue sparks had begun to dance between them like bioluminescence dancing water. "I'm the warlock who's here to cure you. Didn't they tell you I was comming?" "I know who you are, but..." Maia looked dazed. "You look so... so... shiny. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#magnus-bane #maia #mortal-instruments #funny

If a terrorist group wanted to hit Britain, all they'd have to do is kill 100 random celebrities. The country would have a nervous breakown. ↗

— Chris Morris

#celebrities #country #group #hit #kill

He was the firstborn Bridgerton of a firstborn Bridgerton of a firstborn Bridgerton eight times over. He had a dynastic responsibility to be fruitful and multiply. ↗

— Julia Quinn

#funny

Our problems started in Dallas, when the fire-breathing sheep destroyed the King Tut exhibit. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#destruction #earthquakes #floods #funny #funny-and-random

My name is Davis Davis. And don’t call me Mr. Davis! How would you like it if I called you Mr. Archibald, or whatever your first name is? ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #random #funny

...and Jack, who felt like he was on the cusp of being able to read minds and thought it would be all right if Luce wrote him down for that. ("I sense that you're okay with that, am I right?" He made a gun out of his fingers and clicked his tongue.) ↗

— Lauren Kate

#torment #funny

My smile wavers as I revert to my natural state of being: nervous and weird. ↗

— Stephanie Perkins

#introvert #weird #funny

-Oh yes? Can you identify yourself? -Certainly. I'd know me anywhere. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#funny-and-random #humor #humorous #satire #wit