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As soon as I get a new girlfriend, I meet another girl which is nicer and more beautiful than my girlfriend. And because I can't say "no", I try to make out with both. Yeeah... long story short: They ALWAYS find out about the other girl and then I am the asshole.
Poor me! :(
I dont understand my behaviour sometimes so nice to people sometimes so rude
I myself want someone to stay with me but then again my behaviour doesnt let me ...
No more friends they dont like me as m fatty nd wheatish complexion but topper in class nd belong to very well settled family
I hate the mother of my boyfriend. She always talks to you in the nicest way possible but says such hard, brutal and mean things. One time she had a fight with his husband and she told me afterwards that I should be lucky I am not married and I should never get married in my life. And then she added that I am still young and maybe I'll find the right person to be with.... while I am dating her son!
I know she doesn't like me but I think she doesn't know that I know.
I'd like to confess that I know I have a nice and trim figure but I still feel the urge to loose weight.
Stupid society!
i fancy two boys and i only just found out that they are BEST FRIENDS. One of them is reallyyyy fit but literally just wants to fuck me whereas the other is more kind and doesn’t wanna basically use me. And obviously reading this it’s quite obvious that i should go for the nice one but there’s just something about the other boy that i can’t just ignore, there’s so much more sexual chemistry but i just feel like i’ll regret it if i don’t choose the nice one. And because they’re so close i don’t even have time to think about it, i literally have to choose one now as they probably tell each other everything and i can’t lead them on
There is something wrong with me beyond autism.
My dad looked Spanish. I was born with blond hair & weird eyes. He wanted me to have black hair; look oily; & have a narrow bone structure like him. Instead i look like a red skinned with buckeheat hair.
He said i couldnt be his; even yrs later when DNA proved i was science was lying. He loved my Spanish looking sister. He was great to her. Gave Cool cars; everything. Me: he kicked out when i was two. My mom blamed me & gave me away. My life became hell.
At first i had a chance. Kind people took me. A drunk hit us. I watched them die. I somehow crawled out of a crushed buring car.
I was given to a relative next. I was locked in a dark room licking crumbs off the floor for over a yr and a half. I could barely walk when i left.
Then it was an aunt who liked to take drugs; torture me; & do weird sex like stuff.
I was so scared. Someone saw me afraid one day. Tried to tell me about Jesus but was ran off. I wondered who is Jesus. I had never seen a TV or heard a radio. No one even talked to me. I was afraid & mostly always alone. When someone was around they were usually hurting me.
So i asked a man. Who is Jesus? He said you ask him in your heart. Then he was yelled at by my relative & left. I almost never left the house. But I'd heard the name Jesus.
Who was he? This is important. I am autistic. I don't believe in ghosts; big foot; or crazy stuff. During the pandemic ive been doing my best to unite people. Trying to find a way (including lying which is wrong & i normally wouldnt do) to get people to work together & understand each other.
We are all under attack from a virus. Our economy is in a shambles. Peoples lives are being destroyed. People are dying. We should be loving each other & working together.
So i have tried everyway i can to get people to see the orher sides point of view. But I'm tired. Anerisms have me so confused i don't think I'm helping. My disease has left me so tired i can barely walk. I have no home. One of my children is sick & i can't afford to help my ex pay for the bills. I go to her place & fix stuff if i can. But it takes me hours. My mind doesn't work right. My body barely works. I'm so tired.
I almost died recently. My body shut down. I spent hrs on the edge of death crawling to reach help. I do not want to live. Ive wanted to die ever since i was a little boy. But as i lay on the edge of death an angel seemed to be calling forward an inch at a time. Smiling at me. Waving me forward. Yes; i probably hallucinated that; but it kept me alive.
I'm glad it did. My youngest son had shut down since my ex kicked me out. She called begging me to help. I went & calmed him. He is now happy & doing well; but i must see him every 2 wks to keep him feeling secure.
So; i need to be able to prove everything with science. I once saw a Tic Tac; but i know it was just a US craft from the nearby base.
I almost died as a teen. My heart stopped. I seemed to goto Heaven. I talked to Jesus & loved ones long gone. Yes; i probably hallucinated that. But it got me back here. Jesus asked me to come back & help so i did.
But heres two i can't use science to explain. A drunk hit our car. It caved in everywhere except where we set. At the hospital my first childs numbers started dropping. The doctor told me to say goodbye. The nurse left. My wife; i; & two Church friends joined hands. We prayed. I asked God to return my child. instantly his numbers shoot up & he was fine. The nurse ran in; then the doc. Can you explain that to me scientifically? I can not.
We couldnt have kids. We tried sugeries. Hopeless. So four of us joined hands & prayed. The next day my wife took a pregnancy test. She had took one & been to the doc the day before & wasnt pregnant. We were told to give up & consider adoption. Yet two days later the doc confirmed she was pregnant. Other blessings started coming after him. Can you explain that scientifically?
Before a surgary a doc told me to say my goodbyes. I laughed & told him God determines when i leave not men. The next day he shook my hand. He couldnt believe i was alive & also functional.
I was told I'd be dead yrs before age 30. That was many yrs ago.
Heres where all this started for me. As a tiny boy after hearing the name Jesus i asked him in my heart. I felt something enter me. The whole world around me changed. My body stayed but i seemed to travel to Heaven. I met a glowing man in a robe with long brown hair. He said he was Jesus. He told me i was very special. I had been sent here to help. He told me why i was here. Then he sent me back; but left the Holy Spirit in me as a guide. It talks to me. Tells me what is asked of me. I must choose to do it.
Scientifically i can explain the Spirit. It could be part of my sub-concious. What i can't determine is how i knew about Heaven; what Jesus looked like; about the Holy Spirit; about so many things I'd later see in the Bible. I also don't know why i had such an advanced knowledge of space. How did i know things scientists are just now figuring out? It couldnt have been from TV; I'd never seen one. They didnt even put science on TV way back then. No one talked to me. The people around me then had zero science knowledge I'd later learn. So where did i get it? Was i just born smart?
Either way. I seem to be addicted to trying to help. My whole life i tried to help people. Ive been using this old phone that often wont work to try to reach out & guide people to understand those they see as enemies. Trying to make things better for all of you. But i seem to be confused. My mind just wont work right. I'm so tired. I'm mostly living on water & crackers. I just don't have much left.
I need to just concentrate on myself & my kids. Even the Holy Spirit seems to be telling me that. But i seem to be adicted to trying to help others.
What is wrong with me? Right until his death my dad still yelled at me that i wasnt his. He saw my blond haired blue eyed kids & said they couldnt be his. My mom still sayes i was the ugliest baby she ever saw; & that I'm still ugly. I'm autistic. No one except my ex wife ever really wanted me. Why can't i just give up? Why do i keep fighting to help the world when it seems intent on destroying itself?
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