Terry Pratchett

Probably the last man who knew how it worked had been tortured to death years before. Or as soon as it was installed. Killing the creator was a traditional method of patent protection. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#humor #death

The trouble with being a god is that you've got no one to pray to. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#religion #humor

Some people think this is paranoia, but it isn't. Paranoids only think everyone is out to get them. Wizards know it. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#paranoia #humor

But there was more to it than that. As the Amazing Maurice said, it was just a story about people and rats. And the difficult part of it was deciding who the people were, and who were the rats. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#rats #stories #education

I’m a witch. It’s what we do. When it’s nobody else’s business, it’s my business. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#business

It wasn't that Nanny Ogg sang badly. It was just that she could hit notes which, when amplified by a tin bath half full of water, ceased to be sound and became some sort of invasive presence. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#singing #funny

We're on a mission from Glod. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#music

Many people, meeting Aziraphale for the first time, formed three impressions: that he was English, that he was intelligent, and that he was gayer than a tree full of monkeys on nitrous oxide. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#humor

He said it was better to belong where you don't belong than not to belong where you used to belong, remembering when you used to belong there. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#home #men

Colon thought Carrot was simple. Carrot often struck people as simple. And he was. Where people went wrong was thinking that simple meant the same thing as stupid. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#humour #intelligence #stupidity #funny