#absurd

I have nothing but respect for you -- and not much of that. ↗

— Groucho Marx

#gibe #insult #respect

If I have to beat you up to keep you safe, that’s just what I’ll do. It’s this kind of regard for others that makes me believe I’d be a good politician. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#awareness #bad #fight #good #oppression

I came home one night, some month ago, and I went to the closet in my bedroom...and a moth ate my sports jacket. He was laying on the floor, nauseous, y'know. ↗

— Woody Allen

#sports

Religion. It's given people hope in a world torn apart by religion. ↗

— Jon Stewart

#organized-religion #paradox #religion #hope

Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities. ↗

— Voltaire

#atheism #atrocities #barbarity #injustice #religion

Why, look at me. I've worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty. ↗

— Groucho Marx

#state

More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly. ↗

— Woody Allen

#path

Voodoo Girl Her skin is white cloth, and she's all sewn apart and she has many colored pins sticking out of her heart. She has many different zombies who are deeply in her trance. She even has a zombie who was originally from France. But she knows she has a curse on her, a curse she cannot win. For if someone gets too close to her, the pins stick farther in. ↗

— Tim Burton

#poetry #winning

I should go to Paris and jump off of the Eiffel Tower. If I took the Concorde, I could be dead three hours earlier. ↗

— Woody Allen

#paris

When I meet a European, the first thing I say is, “I’d much rather watch football than football.” But I’m just teasing them, and they know I’d really rather watch football than football. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#europe #european #football #soccer #absurd