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#funny

Read through the most famous quotes by topic #funny




Dude, could you please get off my girlfriend before I beat the crap out of you ? I don't want to injure her.


Stacey Wallace Benefiel


#funny #funny

I want to hold onto this funny thing. God, it's gotten big on me. I don't know what it is. I'm so damned unhappy, I'm so mad, and I don't know why. I feel like I'm putting on weight. I feel fat. I feel like I'm saving a lot of things, and I don't know what. I might even start reading books.


Ray Bradbury


#melancholy #funny

[..] we human beings are ready and willing to steal something that does not explicitly reference monetary value - that is, something that lacks the face of a dead president.


Dan Ariely


#funny

Sensing that this stranger was not the dangerous kind, and being the caring, big-hearted dog that he had built his reputation on, Lucky decided that a good dose of tongue licking would put matters right. However, in a twist of bad timing, unluckily for Lucky, he landed his lick just as Felicity rolled over onto her back. So, instead of a friendly lick across the ears as he intended, Lucky’s long slobbery, pink tongue made a trail from Felicity’s chin to her cherry red lips and up to her forehead. ‘AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGHHHH!


Kaal Kaczmarek


#funny #funny

I first got into writing because I got involved in the production of a magazine for army wives. They were short of copy one day and the editor asked me to write a piece about being an army wife "and make it funny". Good at obeying orders I did as I was told, the piece was a success, I was asked to write a regular piece and slowly it ended up as a book.


Catherine Jones


#funny

I woke up the Following morning with the Kings of Leon telling me that "my sex was on fire." I shut off my alarm and that's when all of the memories of the previous night came rushing back.


Kristen Middleton


#lol-funny #music-lyrics #funny

We can’t all be Byronic adventurers like you Jude. Have you been wrestling with any brigands in the mountains there?” “No, but you’ve got to watch the drivers! Funny you should mention the poetic lord. He used to take his holidays down here, you know?” “What… picking up last-minute bargains with ‘EasyFrigate’?


Paul Alkazraji


#humour #lord-byron #funny

The other day I found 20 dollars. It was just lying in a wallet I took from some guy’s pocket.



Jarod Kintz


#bizarre #funny #humor #random #random-thought

If given the choice, I’d take five ones over a five-dollar bill, because women prefer men with lots of money.



Jarod Kintz


#bizarre #choice #funny #humor #money






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