#funny

I had a dream about you. You were a lone candle on a barren vanilla cake, and I was the mighty breath sent to extinguish your light. I felt like God’s wrath coming down to destroy the Illuminati, while you probably thought I was the Satan coming to snuff out the light of the world. And the spectators who were gathered around the spectacle probably thought it was all one big party, as they stood still like mindless zombies singing “Happy Birthday.”
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— Jarod Kintz

#dreams #funny #humor #life #relationships

I had a dream about you. You were a floating blue blob, and I was a painter in a spacesuit floating through the cosmos trying to catch you and imprison you in my painting. I really need to dream more, because that sounds too much like Tuesday nights at Albino Al’s to be considered fantasy. 
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— Dora J. Arod

#dreams #funny #humor #life #relationships

I have a Dominique Wilkins Hawks jersey that I still wear. That's probably my favorite one. What's funny is that I spend all this time collecting jerseys, and now people are out there collecting mine. ↗

— Chris Paul

#favorite #funny #hawks #i #jersey

Most of the gaffes I've made have not been funny - they've been stupid. ↗

— Jim Lehrer

#funny #i #made #most #stupid

So it was just funny to read a script that was just similar to what had been going on in my life. ↗

— Piper Perabo

#funny #going #had #just #life

Vicodin, I got addicted to that little pill. The reason I don't talk about it too much in the press is because it isn't funny, and I love to be funny in interviews. If you joke about that period in your life, it doesn't seem right. ↗

— Matthew Perry

#addicted #because #funny #got #i

It's funny how the music industry is enraged about the Internet and the way things are copied without being paid for. But you know why people steal the music? Because they can't afford the music. ↗

— Tom Petty

#afford #because #being #copied #enraged

I never thought I'd live this long. It sounds funny because I still think of myself as a kid. ↗

— Larry Dixon

#funny #i #kid #live #long

I would really love to do a musical, I don't know in what capacity but something funny. ↗

— Billie Piper

#funny #i #know #love #musical

I am so like Donna it's funny. And most of my friends are guys too. ↗

— Laura Prepon

#donna #friends #funny #guys #i