#jokes

Character is character and voice is voice, which translates nicely from writing novels to writing TV. But the process is different. You have a writer's room, people pitch you jokes and you collaborate. ↗

— Jennifer Weiner

#collaborate #different #jokes #nicely #novels

We combine our three packs of pasta for dinner – pesto. We tip the dried stuff into a pan, add water and simmer. We try it, looking at each other with disbelief as it hits the tastebuds. ‘It’s pesto, Jim, but not as we know it,’ I say. ‘Fascinating,’ says Lou, unsmiling humouring my Star Trek reference, while wincing at the foul food. (And what made me say that? Is there such a thing as a dad-joke vacuum that needs to be filled, even in the wild?) ↗

— Fiona Wood

#camping-food #dad-joke #dad-jokes #fiona-wood #food

Writing for young children I find I often use particular jokes with words and exaggerated, funny events, but some of these haunt the more complex stories for older children too. ↗

— Margaret Mahy

#complex #events #exaggerated #find #funny

I can't crack jokes because I don't have any. ↗

— Rene Redzepi

#because #crack #i #jokes

Don't answer the door in a wedding dress and veil, he might not think you're joking. ↗

— Amy Sedaris

#jokes #relationships #romance #dating

I’ve been on a diet for two weeks and all I’ve lost is two weeks!” -Totie Fields- ↗

— David DeBacco

#diet #jokes #diet

I don't really like jokes in a way. I mean gags are fine but I like weird moments where what you have isn't really a joke, just tiny moments. ↗

— Noel Fielding

#jokes #humor

John, let me make one thing clear,” Jim said, cutting me off in his most stern, evangelical voice. “Every man is blessed with his gifts from the Lord. One of mine happens to be a penis large enough that, if it had a penis of its own, my penis’ penis would be larger than your penis.”..... ..."Fuck all of you,” John retorted. “You don’t even exist. We’re all just a figment of my cock’s imagination. ↗

— David Wong

#hilarity #humour #penises #stupid-boys #imagination

Nothing is a joke with me. It just all comes out like one. ↗

— Lorrie Moore

#jokes #life #life

A man could shoot a squirrel out of a tree from a distance of sixty feet. But he couldn't vomit into a bucket or pee into a pot only two feet away. It was one of the great mysteries of life. ↗

— Maggie Osborne

#man-jokes #mystery-of-life #silver-lining #life