#funny

Don't whine over sensitive issues - cry with laughter. ↗

— Bauvard

#humor #whining #funny

Thoughtful organ donors do not give to charity posthumously. They cultivate many pen pals and ship their deliveries first class. ↗

— Bauvard

#generosity #humor #organ-donor #funny

I happen to find ceilings much lovelier than the night sky myself. Sometimes I just stare at them for hours and wonder what could be up there. ↗

— Bauvard

#ceilings #constellations #funny #humor #sky

It is a known fact that pain and pleasure are the two most basic elements of life. But the secret is to simplify that fact. ↗

— Bauvard

#humor #life #pain #pleasure #sadomasochism

When it comes to adding color to my face, I prefer lipstick. But no one ever lets me apply their lips, since I blush so much. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #humor #kissing #lipstick #funny

I squinted one of my eyes at Daniel. “What are you doing?” he asked. “This is me, giving you the side eye.” I continued to squint. “Well, you look like you’re having a stroke ↗

— Hodkin Michelle

#the-look #the-unbecoming-of-mara-dyer #funny

I said alone!” He nodded in agreement. “Aye, you usually say that, and I still stay. It’s our way. ↗

— Kresley Cole

#humour #love #paranormal-romance #romance #funny

Drunken men give some of the best pep talks. ↗

— Criss Jami

#best #conversation #drink #drinking #drunk

Whenever I think of something but can't think of what it was I was thinking of, I can't stop thinking until I think I'm thinking of it again. I think I think too much. ↗

— Criss Jami

#challenge #clever #cognition #cognitive #cognitive-psychology

A forty-foot worm?" Will muttered to Jem as they moved through the Italian garden, their boots-thanks to a pair of soundless runes-making no noise on the gravel. "Think of the size of the fish we could catch." Jem's lips twitched. "It's not funny, you know." "It is a bit." "You cannot reduce the situation to worm jokes, Will. This is Gabriel and Gideon's father we're discussing." "We're not just discussing him; we're chasing him through an ornamental sculpture garden because he's turned into a worm." "A demonic worm," said Jem, pausing to peer cautiously around a hedgerow. "A great serpent. Would that help your inapropriate humor?" "There was a time where my inapropriate humor brought you a certain amusement," sighed Will. "How the worm has turned." "Will- ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#humor #jem-carstairs #will-herondale #funny