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#funny

Read through the most famous quotes by topic #funny




Then Leo realized something was blocking the middle of his view. Something large and fuzzy, and so close, Leo had to cross his eyes to see it properly. It was a large, ugly face. "Holy mother!" he yelped. The face backed away and came into focus. Staring down at him was a beard man in grimy blue coveralls. His face was lumpy and covered with welts, as if he'd been stung by a million bees, or dragged across gravel. Possibly both. "Humph." the man said. "Holy father, boy. I should think ou know the difference by now.


Rick riodan


#percy-jackson #funny

He’d use this opportunity to impress Rick and show him that he did, in fact, have more to offer than just being a sexy skanktart. To show that he wasn’t just a brainless bimfoon, that’s when a bimbo breeds with a buffoon, resulting in a true, hot mess.


Kyle Adams


#drag #drag-queen #funny #kyle-adams #skanktart

Have you ever chopped down something with an ax? Not fun. I now have serious doubts regarding George Washington and his cherry tree.


Tammy Blackwell


#funny

It's a sweet setup, I'll admit. For all that the maids STILL show up each day with jumbo crucifixes, jumpy movements, and red eyes from crying over the short straw that drew them vampire duty.' Yesterday, she'd just stopped herself from raising her clenched hands above her head and chasing one of them around the room groaning, 'I vant to suck your blood.


Kresley Cole


#kresley-cole #vampire #vampires #funny

Zen cuts straight through the Quidditch match in progress and almost gets taken down by a Beater hurling a Nerf quaffle right at his machopartes.


Megan McCafferty


#harry-potter-related #quidditch #funny

Okay, time to get serious. I let my smile fade slowly and lowered my pitch, as no human woman could have. “I’m not joking this time. If I see it, it’s mine, and you won’t get it back at the end of the school year.” I growled, deep and long, savoring the feel of the vibrations in my throat, as if the sound alone could save me. It wasn’t quite a cat’s growl but it was damn close. And it was his last warning. Miguel dismissed my threat with an easy smile, and my stomach clenched. Oh, yeah, Faythe. You have Puss shaking in his boots, all right.


Rachel Vincent


#rachel-vincent #stray #funny

As long as you are wearing a hat made out of shingles, you’ll always have a roof over your head.


Jarod Kintz


#hat #roof #funny

What's a wingding? Why, a wingding is, uh...it's just like a shindig but without all the hullabaloo.


Cuthbert Soup


#funny

I thank God daily for the good fortune of my birth, for I am certain I would have made a miserable peasant.


C.S. Forester


#funny

I killed my clone and I hid his body behind every mirror I’ll ever step in front of. I’m always surprised to see him, and I never fail to brush his teeth or gaze at his decomposing body.


Jarod Kintz


#funny #kill #funny






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