#hilarious

We were the guys on the other side. It was hilarious. ↗

— David Steinberg

#hilarious #other #side #were

It's hilarious a lot of times. You have a conversation with someone, and he's like, 'You speak so well!' I'm like, 'What do you mean? Do you understand that's an insult? ↗

— Jay-Z

#hilarious #i #insult #like #lot

No more tubs for me." I jumped off the bed and pulled on a pair of Pack sweats. "They make me lose all sense." Curran sprawled on the bed with a big self-satisfied smile. "Want to know a secret?" "Sure." "It's not the bathtub, baby." Well, aren't we smug. I picked up the corner of the lowest mattress and made a show of looking under it. "What are you looking for?" "A pea Your Majesty." "What?" "You heard me." I jumped back as he lunged and his fingers missed me by an inch. "Getting slow in your old age." "I thought you liked it slow." A flashback to last night mugged me and my mind executed a full stop. He laughed. "Ran out of snappy comebacks?" "Hush. I'm trying to think of one. ↗

— Ilona Andrews

#hilarious #ilona-andrews #kate #magic #age

Terrorism is just a whole other level of anger management issues. ↗

— Thisuri Wanniarachchi

#hilarious #humor #terrorism #anger

Merlin seeks assistance from Pigwiggen, the only one of Arthur's knights who is also a fairy, and they unite their enchantments to move the British Court to Turkestan. Lively end to Act One. ↗

— Davies Robertson

#gibberish #hilarious #humanities #lyre-of-orpheus #art

An artist who painted a face was now 'playing with the idea of portraiture,' or 'exploring push-pull aesthetics,' or toying with contradictions like 'menacing-slash-playful,' but he or she was never, ever, just painting a face. ↗

— Steve Martin

#hilarious-nerd #art

Don’t do that? This is your sage advice?” “Yeah.” He burped and blew it out the side of his mouth. “Sorry, the burritos we had for lunch are kinda comin’ back on me. ↗

— Mary Calmes

#crane #hilarious #change

He even dressed up for you. He only has one stain on his t-shirt.- Rylie Cruz ↗

— Rose Pressey

#dating

His father had always said, Son, the most important thing in life is to make a contribution. Who would have thought Kittridge’s contribution would be video-blogging from the front lines of the apocalypse? ↗

— Justin Cronin

#incongruous #life

Oh, how I longed to burst through the doors and go walking through the streets, with my hands open, like weapons! ↗

— Marcel Béalu

#hilarious #revenge #silly #experience