#jokes

What's so unpleasant about being drunk?" "Ask a glass of water! ↗

— Douglas Adams

#humour #jokes #humour

I like writing a joke, and I like when a joke works, and I like other comics who tell jokes. ↗

— Dave Attell

#i #joke #jokes #like #other

There's a few tunes of mine that don't have jokes, but most of them have a joke and they have a humorous point of view somewhere. ↗

— Mose Allison

#humorous #joke #jokes #mine #most

I reserve the right to tell shaggy dog stories or even common jokes as part of what I'm doing. I don't give a damn if half the audience walks out. ↗

— David Antin

#common #damn #dog #doing #even

All of my jokes were about not being able to meet anybody. I didn't have any insight into anything - even my own insecurities. ↗

— Judd Apatow

#about #any #anybody #anything #being

I keep getting these people at my shows who only know me from television. I can always tell when they're, like, emotionally flinching when I start doing my jokes. ↗

— Dave Attell

#doing #emotionally #flinching #getting #i

I prefer sayings over jokes. ↗

— Robert Ballard

#jokes #over #prefer #sayings

I think the more the actor lets you know what he thinks of the character, the less the audience cares - like a comedian who laughs at his own jokes. ↗

— Neil LaBute

#audience #cares #character #comedian #his

One of the jokes on our flight is that, if we have a normal entry day going, the plan is for me... to actually take the orbiter first and fly it for maybe 10 or 15 seconds and then hand it on over to Scooter. ↗

— Duane G. Carey

#day #entry #first #flight #fly

I'm a fun person. I like cracking jokes and being completely nerdy. ↗

— Helena Christensen

#completely #cracking #fun #i #jokes