#sarcasm

You were a well-respected agent, Michael, a rags-to-riches fairytale ending. Until you became disgraced. Now it appears your own organization wishes to be rid of you. Why is this?” “My gun turned back into a pumpkin. ↗

— Nenia Campbell

#humor #sarcasm #funny

I don't know about your true form, but the weight of your ego sure is pushing the crust of the earth toward the breaking point. ↗

— Jim Butcher

#ferro #harry-dresden #humor #sarcasm #humor

You like them," I realized. Noah's eyebrows lifted in question. "Like as people." "As opposed to...furniture?" "They're my PARENTS." "That is my understanding, yes. ↗

— Michelle Hodkin

#sarcasm #humor

You must have been going very fast." "I was, until I hit the fence. ↗

— Anthony Horowitz

#sarcasm #humor

Sarcasm creates a chasm between yourself and others. ↗

— Gayle Forman

#sarcasm #humor

Yeah you can have a word," said Harry savagely. "Good-bye. ↗

— J.K. Rowling

#sarcasm #tell-off #wit #humor

could you attempt, at least, to make yourself presentable? I know this is a war, but the rest of us are trying to pretend it's a party. ↗

— Kristin Cashore

#sarcasm #humor

Why can't these American women stay in their own country? They are always telling us that it is the paradise for women. It is. That is the reason why, like Eve, they are so excessively anxious to get out of it. ↗

— Oscar Wilde

#escape #eve #humor #paradise #sarcasm

Can you enter a house uninvited?" "No." "Why?" "That would be rude. ↗

— Abigail Gibbs

#humor #sarcasm #vampire-mythology #violet #humor

That's great," Katie said. "Actually, it's revolutionary. If you can work and be in love at the same time, you're the first woman I ever knew that could. Maybe you're the missing link, Amanda." Maybe you ought to get a job for the 'Ladies Home Journal.' They like simplistic shit like that. ↗

— Ellen Gilchrist

#sarcasm #love