Still Confessions

Damn, I simply cannot get over my ex... and we were only together for like 6 months and that was 2 years ago...
He just got into my head and I cannot forget about him... He is an arrogant bastard with a small dick but a big inflated ego but despite that... I compare every man I have been with since with him... I still love him.
K., you are a pitiful human being, but I am still in love with you.

#ex   #stillinlove   #love   #crush   #bastard   #sex  

I broke up with my girlfriend because I'm still in love with my ex girlfriend.

#girlfriend   #ex   #love   #still  

I did something so dumb but wanted to do this for helping poor kids out there. and I over spent $1,000 plus and want to spend other $700 on xmas secret santa gifts for kids for salvos because they don't have enough and I am on a disability pension and I feel so stupid I did this but I want to. I do care. I wish someone could help me raise some money to help fund my idea. Its not for me but for the kids out there. I just want to let them know someone cares. if you start a go fund me on chemist page I would appreciate it. I am doing products kids can use like shampoos, hand wipes, body sprays and lip balms, toothpaste and toothbrushes etc.

am I a loser dickhead or what? !

fuck xmas and being poor I am sick of it. I poor but I want to help. so go figure it out.

#with   #scratches   #of   #rash   #and   #infection   #i   #want   #to   #still   #help   #others  

I pushed him once and he began to kick me,choke me,and throw me against the wall. I decided it was the last time. I punched him and he called the cops saying it was the neighbors who called. They arrived and I told them I attacked him for no reason and I was arrested. I took the fall for you so you could go into the army because you cannot go with a domestic assault charge. You never went. We got back together after 6 months of not being able to live in my own apartment because of the state and the charges. You were using and selling meth. You cheated on me. Your friend murdered someone and you let them stay in “our” apartment. You’re just as guilty and by the way,I broke my bond conditions to talk to you the whole time. I put my whole life at stake for you and you never once failed to break my heart. Thanks to the shit you post on social media everybody thinks I’m a monster. You make me feel like I’m a monster...I moved out when he was at work one day because I was scared of him and I had enough. I feel so guilty about the murder but if I speak up I could die and it’s too late. Any evidence they once had is probably gone or invalid. I don’t even know who is reading this but I wake up everyday and pray to God I never see him again. I just wanna get my degree and move. I can’t stand to live in the same little town as him. My name has been completely slaughtered and I am embarrassed to leave my house. No one believes my side of the story. Some one please believe me and be on my side. I’m tired of feeling so alone. I have posted this same confession to various sites in different writing styles in hopes someone will read it and understand and maybe they also won’t feel so alone. Every time I talk about it or think about it. I feel so many different negative emotions. I can’t ever word it the exact same every time. I just feel disgusted.

I've always been depressed. For as long as I can remember the past 7 years have been hell in my life. There were some really good times when the flame gets too hot you enjoy it, like spending time with your family or staying up with your one friend but every single night, for the past 7 years, not once did I feel I was good with life. I'm not suicidal anymore, I think it's ridiculous. I don't self harm, or do anything I don't want to to my body. I'm so tired of life, but I don't want to die either. I want to pause, sit still, be quite and freeze everything around me. I want to be completely alone, surrounded​ by no one and nothing. No light, no color, no voice, sounds, or noise. I want the whole world to stop.

#depression   #time   #quite  

(Continuation of another secret)
My ex boyfriend was abusive to me and I got the chance to go to a party and kissed 3 different people. (This was about one week before I left him. ) All I felt was guilt. I was hoping I would fall in love and they would take me away from him and everything he has done to me but we live in the real world,not a fairytale. I felt so guilty as soon as I got him I told him what happened and he called me names and tried to punish me and told me I had to act certain ways and do certain things. In other words, he was trying to control me more than he already did. I moved out when he was at work and I haven’t seen him face to face since. He got on social media and said I was a lying,cheating whore. He cheated on me for one whole year while he was on meth. He is still on meth from what I hear because he has lost more weight. He also put his hands on me more often than not. My friends mom caught him choking me once. Everybody thinks I’m a monster and I hate the fact they think that but at least someone on the internet will listen to me. I keep posting this and different parts because my side of the story was never heard. So by me posting all of this it is forcing someone to hear about it...I hope.