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Read the best #depression confession stories
I did so many wrong choices... i was drunk cuz i got kicked from school few weeks ago.. and my dumb ass went home alone, in dark clothes and i saw car... i was so scared but he saw me... well until i realized he went straight into tree.. i was the cause of the accident... i mean noone got killed but still i feel like shit for that... got no charges however, still dont know how...
#depression #accident #car #unwell #choices #confession
I got my bf a headset for his birthday when he broke his phone because I wanted to talk to him, you know I’m attached and shit, but now I completely regret it because he spends ALLL OF HIS TIME TALKING TO HIS FRIENDS AND IGNORING ME, like it actually makes me depressed.
So I... had an affair with this guy some three years ago. Ugly as fuck, to be honest. Ok I mean, just really unattractive. Our relationship was essentially based on weed. Not that I didn't buy my own. But I would always use with him, just to have someone to smoke with, since I get really anxious when I do. I would smoke loads back then. Then I stopped buying it. 'cause I wanted to stop. But I kept visiting this man's house. We wouldn't have sex anymore, I was having sex with another guy, a friend of his actually. This other guy was kind of nice and really cares about me but I cut him out of my life 'cause he won't have sex with me anymore 'cause he thinks I'm desperate. Which I kind of am. My life is so dull 'cause I have no plans, no projects, no motivation. Aside from weed, I smoke cigarettes and drink, I don't drink too much but yeah, I'm kind of the addictive type you know. Most of all I was addicted, I still am, to these two men. And I'm also anorexic/bulimic, not too thin lately, and I've managed to stop the binging and purging, I'm making progress you know, but still no future, no education... I used to be in university. I was studying philosophy. I was the brightest student in my year, but I was always on drugs and when I started sleeping with these guys I pretty much gave up on everything else. I tried to launch a music career, so to speak. I mean, as I was hurting like a goddamn dog I started composing sad tunes on my guitar. I've been in therapy all my teen and adult life, I'm 23, it's been more than ten years, with different therapists. Maybe I'm gay, maybe I'm bisexual, maybe I'm a random nymphomaniac, narcissistic, shizotypical, borderline fucked up mess with daddy issues and a self-centred attitude and paranoia and bipolar depression and no friends, virtually zero people I trust. I have no idea what I am, it's not like I've been abused and furthermore I got tested and they say I have nothing, I'm just kind of above average intelligence-wise and particularly sensitive, that's what they say. I taught myself how to play piano in ten days and I can do some pretty impressive stuff and bla bla bla yeah I'm showing off. But really I'm just so sad. I dropped out of uni, anyhow. Oh, I said that already didn't I. And I masturbate almost daily but with a sense of disgust even. I don't enjoy any kind of porn anymore, and I don't even enjoy actual sex, I mean, I had a couple of really good fucks with these two guys but yeah who cares. And what kills me is I've been so in love with the second guy but I fucked up because I'm fucked up and now he's gone but it's been three years and I was his first girl so it was bound to happen wasn't it. Why shouldn't he want to be with someone normal who doesn't hit him when he doesn't want to have sex, someone who is not so whiny as I am, so bitter and self-centred and FUCK I wish I could turn back time or I just wish he could DIE sometimes I really do everything except move on with his life leaving me here in my ugly stinky rut. I'm so depressed I've gotten used to it but sometimes I get these glimpses of lucidity and they really hurt.
#life #sex #drugs #weed #future #depression #addiction #issues
I'm depressed and I use porn or sexual innuendos as a coping mechanism. Does it make me happy for those few minutes, yes. Does it help me, well no. It makes the situation even worse.
#sex #depression #porn #stupid
I hate my life. I have hit rock bottom. My wife of five years, together for fourteen years cheated lied and style since I met her. We divorced and now I find out she is fucking one of my buddies. He just had a baby. She broke them up. A six months later I meet this beautiful lady, we hit it off, had crazy hot frequent kinky sex, fell in love. Turns out the entire time she has been fucking other dudes from a hookup site. Just before I figure all that out she rips me off.
So I start thinking about this right. There's a trend. All my friends, buddies, even best friends, all the people I've had in my life including the two women have faded away when I can't lend money or help them out. The only people who call me ask for money or favours. I'm not rich by any means, but I share what I have.
Now I'm broke and alone. No friends left, my fucking dog doesn't even like me anymore I think. My whole life everybody who smiles at me has been laughing at me. Look at that idiot go. Moron doesn't even know I'm fucking his woman. Borrowed money off him to go party with other guys.
I'm done. People suck. I have nothing left.
Sometimes I just feel like shooting myself in the head. This depression anxiety shit is ruining my life. I’m a Asian guy who’s only into white girls. I just think they’re the angels of the world. I’ve been rejected so many times that I just want to fuck it all. I think loneliness kills more people than cancer. FML
I've been in deep depression for...well, it's been so long I forget. My family has now began to put it aside and I'm starting to be the neglected forgotten child in the house. My sister's kid has started to take my place. My father and I rarely talk anymore. Just the other day he refused to look at me once. The desire to just kill myself gets stronger every day. The pain of self harm starts to feel calming now. The pray that when I fall sleep, I never wake up. I keep a tab open of fastest ways to kill myself. I hate the fact I have to deal with this reality. I just want it to end....so bad. I've hurt myself to many times and no one has cared anymore. I've written so many suicide notes. I'm broken.
I have a tendency to push away people. I lost all emotions, my heart turned cold, I lost interest in a lot of things. Sometimes i feel alone. I've been trying to figure out why. I Just can't find the answer.
Sometimes I write suicide notes and hide them in my room until I can leave them on my desk before I overdose on pills.
I think I'm depressed but I don't know what to do about it. I can't go to school and it's especially hard on a Monday when I get this heavy, dull feeling I can't shake. But I sleep perfectly every night. My family think I'm just moody but it's more than that; the "moods" I get last for a long time and it's like I can't see the so called 'light at the end of the tunnel' and I've thought about suicide a lot.
I couldn't ever kill my self though because of my family and best friend and what that would do to them but it's really bad today. I call them "bad days" and only my friend knows about this because I skip school a lot and she covers for me.
I dont know what to do or how to tell my family... or if I even want to.
I hate myself and my body. I am getting fatter and I have tried everything. I am skipping breakfast and lunch, starving myself, and exercising, but nothing helps. My body won't change no matter how hard I try. It has gotten so bad that I am being called big, and fat by my own parents. I just want to die so I don't have to deal with the pressure of having the perfect body.
#fat #ugly #hate #depression
I am with my boyfriend whose tried to kill himself three times, I love him but I also want to leave him because I feel like I'm trapped. But I know if I leave he will kill himself. I'm so scared but I don't know what else to do because I value his life and I love him.
There's day when I feel 100% and days like today when I want to end it all... I don't know why it's like this or why I tend to get this way but I wish he knew I needed him.
#lonely #hurt #depression
i dont know why i am living in this world.Sometimes i feel to suscide.whenever i do something i only get caught everytime.I use to see my classmates bunking college every friday as we use to come out frim college to school but once i thought of bunking.i left the school but told my grandma i will be coming home as i am having fever (although its a lie) i came out prayed and thought to go and play csgo (a game of steam) it took me1 hour to play it and left home but when i came home the school mentor called at home saying rayyan is not at home.now you what happened to me
I usually sleep on my right side but last light for some reason i could only get comfortable laying on my belly, so i ended up falling asleep that way. I woke up this morning to severe discomfort and quickly realized my penis had twisted up and was pushed into my body and it was fully erect aswell. I tried to pull it out but i felt as if it was locked in two direct ways. It's still like that and it won't go flacid.i'm so embarrases to go to the hospital because i don't egen know what to make of this. Has anyone ever experienced anything like this before. I am really freaked out.
#penis #injury #weird #bizarre #confused #embarassed #humiliated #medical #distress #depression #despair #desperate
I am 35years old, no career, no job and need to take care of my mum. I am in need (more desperate ) of a career, an income and some independence to be able to help my mum. I have so many dreams and I honestly do not even know how to begin fulfilling them. This is never how I imagined my life going. I feel so helpless. All I have is a dream to become a beauty therapist and no way of doing so. How did i get here? My confession is I am so desperate for help, I am considering the unthinkable.
About a month ago, I had a miscarage. I’ve only told my parents and husband about it and they’ve asked me if I was okay. I keep telling them I am and to not say anything to anyone else because it won’t change anything. But the truth is I was never okay to start with and i cry whenever I’m alone and no one can see it.
When I was moving to secondary school I had plenty of friends and was always the centre of attention but as soon as I moved to secondary I started to fade away like nobody notice me so at the time I thought it would be a great idea to fake my depression/suicidal thoughts to get attention I would post on social media about how I wanted to die and that nobody cared about me anymore. And it worked I was getting a lot of attention and I loved it until my childhood best friend who meant a lot to me went and told my parents I know she was only doing it to protect me but the only reason I stated doing this so she would give me more attention, I felt like shit my parents asked me why I was posting this stuff and I couldn’t tell them the real reason because I was to embarrassed and I thought they would hate me for it so I just told them that I was being bullied. I said that I was being picked on by 4 boys which I kinda was but it was only inside jokes they would call me 4 eyes and pick on me put we always saw it as a joke so I just blamed it on that, and it worked my parents told the school about the boys and they were punished and I felt so bad I actually thought about killing myself but after all this my parents took me out of school to home school me this was the worst point of my life.
My best friend slowly drifted from me I was losing all my friends and I had no one left, my parents put me into therapy (it didn’t work because there was nothing to work on). A whole year goes by of me being home schooled I’m trapped indoors most of the time because my parents won’t let me go out and I couldn’t use social media anymore so I had no way of contacting my best friend, at this point my mental state started deteriorating I was going insane until I finally snapped and ran away. I wasn’t gone for long as I had no where to go but the first place I went to was to go see my best friend she lived quite close to me so it wasn’t really a problem so I went to go see her but she didn’t want to see me I was confused until I talked to another close friend of mine and released that the whole school knew I was faking my depression for attention my heart sank because I knew that everybody would hate me now and I would lose everyone. After all this I went home and my parents were talking to the police because they were scared that I was gonna try kill myself, when I got inside the house my parents told me that they are sending me to hospital to be put on suicidal watch i didn’t want to go but I had to while I was there I saw my phone in my mothers bag and I grabbed it to try msg my best friend and explain things but when I logged into Instagram I saw hate groups mate for me saying that I should actually kill myself I felt awful but what made me hate myself even more is the fact that my best friend had blocked me and sent me a message saying that she wanted nothing to do with me my heart sank. I had lost everything I had nothing left I just wanted the pain that I caused to end so I stood up and ran to the canteen, the canteen didn’t have anything sharp in it other than the knifes they were not to sharp to stop people from killing themselves but I made it work I grabbed one and ran to the toilets I quickly locked the door some of the nurses noticed what i was doing and tried kicking down the door, I tried slitting my throught with the knife but it wouldn’t go deep enough and by the time I managed to make the knife sharp enough they had already broken down the door I was taken away from there and put into a mental hospital where I have stayed for 4 years I don’t know what my ex friends are up to now but all I know is they don’t care about me anymore no one does and it’s all my fault I only wanted my best friend to show me more attention because deep down I loved her but I was to afraid to tell her.
Sorry about the really bad English and grammar I haven’t really learned much seeing as most of my time as been spent in this hell hole my hour on the phone is nearly up so I got to go but if I was to give you a life lesson do not fake mental illness for attention it completely fucked up my life and I don’t think i will ever be able to reedem myself goodbye
And Izzy if your reading this I’m sorry I always loved you but I was to afraid to say it maybe in another life I wouldn’t be so selfish and just puck up the corage to ask you out.
#depression #bestfriend #love #suicidal #suicide #attention #fake
I often contemplate divorce, I love my wife but I have not been happy for years and I keep convincing myself things will get better but I'm starting to get the the point where I dont care anymore.
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