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Read the best #depression confession stories
I think about killing myself every day. I have a plan that I could put into action at any moment. I just waiting for that one more thing to push me over the edge. Just give me reason to end it all
#sad #suicide #depression
There's day when I feel 100% and days like today when I want to end it all... I don't know why it's like this or why I tend to get this way but I wish he knew I needed him.
#lonely #hurt #depression
I masturbate, I didn't know it was a sin until I watched this movie, yes God yes,I am scared I don't know what to do.
#i #masturbate #depression #anxiety #disrespectful #jealous #low #self #esteem #anger
What’s the point?
What’s the point in bearing with all of the troubles that we have during our lives?
With all of the wars and battles that kill thousands of peoples’ lives, but when it comes down to the choice to end it all or not, they ask you to stay alive because your “important.”
What’s the point in dealing with all of the criticism that we receive because all of the other people don’t believe in our beliefs?
And we all know that the end of the world is truly near, but we’re too scared to admit that everything will be destroyed.
And whether that day will come in a lifetime or not, death is inevitable and no one will remember your hard work.
All of the nights you stayed awake to finish that project for school and the many hours that you spent working just so that you could have a roof over your head.
And for what?
We all know that you’re too scared to admit that living another day of our lives is a lot more painful than dying.
So why do we do it?
Why do we put ourselves through so much pain and suffering just because we need to live another day, waiting for absolutely nothing?
Why do we fill our lives with lies by saying that we are going to save the planet, but our mere existence is destroying it?
Why is it so important for one out of the billions of people on Earth to stay alive?
Because of greed?
Just to gain that satisfaction of saying that you saved someone’s life when you’re actually putting them through more pain than you can imagine?
What’s the point?
I'm depressed and I use porn or sexual innuendos as a coping mechanism. Does it make me happy for those few minutes, yes. Does it help me, well no. It makes the situation even worse.
#sex #depression #porn #stupid
Sometimes I lie about being depressed. My friends are so oblivious. I just want to be appreciated and get some attention. But I'll never take it to the extreme. Age: 13 y/o
I think I'm depressed but I don't know what to do about it. I can't go to school and it's especially hard on a Monday when I get this heavy, dull feeling I can't shake. But I sleep perfectly every night. My family think I'm just moody but it's more than that; the "moods" I get last for a long time and it's like I can't see the so called 'light at the end of the tunnel' and I've thought about suicide a lot.
I couldn't ever kill my self though because of my family and best friend and what that would do to them but it's really bad today. I call them "bad days" and only my friend knows about this because I skip school a lot and she covers for me.
I dont know what to do or how to tell my family... or if I even want to.
I often contemplate divorce, I love my wife but I have not been happy for years and I keep convincing myself things will get better but I'm starting to get the the point where I dont care anymore.
So I... had an affair with this guy some three years ago. Ugly as fuck, to be honest. Ok I mean, just really unattractive. Our relationship was essentially based on weed. Not that I didn't buy my own. But I would always use with him, just to have someone to smoke with, since I get really anxious when I do. I would smoke loads back then. Then I stopped buying it. 'cause I wanted to stop. But I kept visiting this man's house. We wouldn't have sex anymore, I was having sex with another guy, a friend of his actually. This other guy was kind of nice and really cares about me but I cut him out of my life 'cause he won't have sex with me anymore 'cause he thinks I'm desperate. Which I kind of am. My life is so dull 'cause I have no plans, no projects, no motivation. Aside from weed, I smoke cigarettes and drink, I don't drink too much but yeah, I'm kind of the addictive type you know. Most of all I was addicted, I still am, to these two men. And I'm also anorexic/bulimic, not too thin lately, and I've managed to stop the binging and purging, I'm making progress you know, but still no future, no education... I used to be in university. I was studying philosophy. I was the brightest student in my year, but I was always on drugs and when I started sleeping with these guys I pretty much gave up on everything else. I tried to launch a music career, so to speak. I mean, as I was hurting like a goddamn dog I started composing sad tunes on my guitar. I've been in therapy all my teen and adult life, I'm 23, it's been more than ten years, with different therapists. Maybe I'm gay, maybe I'm bisexual, maybe I'm a random nymphomaniac, narcissistic, shizotypical, borderline fucked up mess with daddy issues and a self-centred attitude and paranoia and bipolar depression and no friends, virtually zero people I trust. I have no idea what I am, it's not like I've been abused and furthermore I got tested and they say I have nothing, I'm just kind of above average intelligence-wise and particularly sensitive, that's what they say. I taught myself how to play piano in ten days and I can do some pretty impressive stuff and bla bla bla yeah I'm showing off. But really I'm just so sad. I dropped out of uni, anyhow. Oh, I said that already didn't I. And I masturbate almost daily but with a sense of disgust even. I don't enjoy any kind of porn anymore, and I don't even enjoy actual sex, I mean, I had a couple of really good fucks with these two guys but yeah who cares. And what kills me is I've been so in love with the second guy but I fucked up because I'm fucked up and now he's gone but it's been three years and I was his first girl so it was bound to happen wasn't it. Why shouldn't he want to be with someone normal who doesn't hit him when he doesn't want to have sex, someone who is not so whiny as I am, so bitter and self-centred and FUCK I wish I could turn back time or I just wish he could DIE sometimes I really do everything except move on with his life leaving me here in my ugly stinky rut. I'm so depressed I've gotten used to it but sometimes I get these glimpses of lucidity and they really hurt.
#life #sex #drugs #weed #future #depression #addiction #issues
Do you ever feel like you’re tearing at the seams and you know you have to be the one to sew yourself back together, but you start to notice that you’re running out of thread?
I've always been depressed. For as long as I can remember the past 7 years have been hell in my life. There were some really good times when the flame gets too hot you enjoy it, like spending time with your family or staying up with your one friend but every single night, for the past 7 years, not once did I feel I was good with life. I'm not suicidal anymore, I think it's ridiculous. I don't self harm, or do anything I don't want to to my body. I'm so tired of life, but I don't want to die either. I want to pause, sit still, be quite and freeze everything around me. I want to be completely alone, surrounded by no one and nothing. No light, no color, no voice, sounds, or noise. I want the whole world to stop.
#depression #time #quite
My brother was about to shoot himself and I called the police on him to intervene. He doesn’t talk to me anymore, his guns was removed and he got issued a few fines. Lost his job. He hates me with everything he has and secretly I love it. I love that he hates me, that he feels this great emotion towards me because it means his still alive. All I want is for him to keep fighting and if his hatred for me keeps him alive then I hope he hates me forever. If I had a chance I wouldn’t change a thing. The pain of you hating me wouldn’t hold a candle to the pain of never being able to see you grow old. I love you my brother
#suicide #brother #confession #depression #scared #pain
I hate my life. I have hit rock bottom. My wife of five years, together for fourteen years cheated lied and style since I met her. We divorced and now I find out she is fucking one of my buddies. He just had a baby. She broke them up. A six months later I meet this beautiful lady, we hit it off, had crazy hot frequent kinky sex, fell in love. Turns out the entire time she has been fucking other dudes from a hookup site. Just before I figure all that out she rips me off.
So I start thinking about this right. There's a trend. All my friends, buddies, even best friends, all the people I've had in my life including the two women have faded away when I can't lend money or help them out. The only people who call me ask for money or favours. I'm not rich by any means, but I share what I have.
Now I'm broke and alone. No friends left, my fucking dog doesn't even like me anymore I think. My whole life everybody who smiles at me has been laughing at me. Look at that idiot go. Moron doesn't even know I'm fucking his woman. Borrowed money off him to go party with other guys.
I'm done. People suck. I have nothing left.
Hello!
I confess to being a cocaine addict, among other things that I want to confess about. This is a long story and I will keep it as short as possible. It all started when I was in middle school, just as I was finishing 8th grade, i had reached a point in my life where I had become aware of how alone I was. I was being bullied my whole life in high school but only when I turned 14 did the loneliness begin to really hit me. I wanted to fit in with everyone so badly that I was willing to do anything. Once, I saw a group of popular kids doing drugs in the bathroom stall and they caught me looking at them. I asked if I could join and they didn't believe that a girl like me would even dare to do drug with them and thats when the insecure little girl inside me forced me to put aside all rationality and I just went for it. Since that day I have been battling addiction, depression and anxiety. I have to spend the rest of my life popping pills for my withdrawal symptoms and depression and I have to work my ass off to get my self-esteem back on track all for a second of impulsivity. Till today, I would say that i regret no thinking of the consequences. I regret not thinking of myself or my family before jumping into the trap. More than anything, I want to go back to the day and get the last 6 years of my life back...
I want to shoot myself in the fucking mouth. I can't do anything right and I'm not good enough for my girlfriend. I just want it all to end
This is my story of mental abuse, caused by my parents.
I'm 11, and I was depressed last year. After my mother called me a bitch, which she did two more times over that year, I became depressed... I asked to not wash the dishes, because I had fallen over and hurt my leg (which still hurt like hell!) but she didn't give a shit! She said, "Stop treating me like dirt, you Little Bitch!" and never said sorry. A few months after, and I still felt horrible. I was fat. My mother had told me this over and over. The truth is, I was tall as an average 12yr old and the right weight for that but since I was ten... I was "Fat" and "Chubby"... One day, I begged my mom to not let me go to a Scout Camp, because I didn't really know anyone in my group, but she just said, "Stop acting like a bitch and get ready!", which made me feel more depressed. I barely spoke on the camp, and I was starting to become an introvert. When everyone else was on a sugar-high I had to do something, but didn't know how. I didn't ask and ended up spilling the container of dirty water. They yelled at me for not asking for help, clearly not understanding what it means to be an introvert, and I felt horrible... A few weeks after that, I heard my mother saying, "Lesbians all should burn in hell!" to my father, and my heart fell to the ground. I've had many crushes, on both male and female. I know I'm bisexual already... The next day we were in the car, and I asked my mother what she thought of gays...
She said, "It's their life. They can do what they want."
"What if I'm bisexual?"
"YOU ARE TOO YOUNG TO KNOW WHAT LOVE IS! Uh, but if you are bi, we will accept you.."
I used to be an extrovert, but I'm now introverted. I'm a brilliant actress, but only because I've been hiding my depression. I never cut myself, thanks to my best friend, Eggie, but I came close to drinking bleach when my father told me to "Fuck off", but didn't thanks to her. I have another really close friend, Austin, and he's fine with who I am and I feel wanted for once in my life. I am no longer depressed, but when I say "I love you" to them, I don't mean it... I care about them, hell they're my parents, but they have taught me to not stand up for myself and that I am worthless... I wish there was a way out of this hell. I wish I could tell someone! My friends think I never think about ending it, but that's not true! I believe I'm worthless, regardless of how many times I'm told I'm not! I wish I could just be who I want. I wish I could have been born into a family that cares about my well being! I am shy and introverted, but my family thinks I'm a happy, loud, extrovert! I have anxiety, but I can't tell anyone face to face because I'll break down and crying is weak! I am weak, so why do I hide it? I'm never going to be worth anything! I just wish, that when I closed my eyes and dreamed, that it wouldn't end. That I'd one day wake up and everything will be fine... I just hope god let's things become better...
#depression #wish #listen #help #love #never #friends #parents #hate
My (m.29 at the time) fiancé (f. 28 at the time) died 2 years ago, we were together for 9 years. It happened out of the blue and we didn't see it coming. Ever since then i've gotten so depressed and lost myself so much from the person i used to be that i'm not sure she would still love me. I've started having panic attacks over the silliest things about my own health (i.e., think i'm having a heart attack, stroke, ect...) with no reason to believe that those things are happening or could. I tried going to therapy not long after she had passed away, but i didn't like the doctor, he just felt really robotic and like he was reading from a script, so i stopped going, and haven't done anything about it since. i'm not sure if it's survivors guilt or something, but i almost don't care to take care of myself for reasons i can't exactly pinpoint. i don't want to talk to my parents or friends or other family about my mental health situation because i know it would just upset them and make them sad for me and i don't want to do that to them. sometimes i just want to pack the most basic of belongings and just disappear out of their lives and maybe they'd just forget about me and i can have a do over with my life. i don't think i ever would, but i think about it a lot.
Oh you guys do NOT understand how much I hate this fucking shit life. Gosh people annoy me so fucking much, plus I’ve got no friends. UGHHJJ I fucking hate it, you guys just don’t understand words can’t explain how much I hate life NO WORDS. The only good about life is food nothing else. UGHHHHH and I’m not going to kill myself because I still wanna eat, but that’s about all that’s hkeeping me going
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