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My boy best friend proposed to me yesterday. Did I mention he smoked a lotta weed? He was pretty much of a failure and that was the reason I became his bff, cuz I was always there for him and listened to his problems. He tried to kiss me, I pushed away. Today it's 10pm and he is still not home. His friends are calling me to ask if I know something but I am hiding what happened. His phone is switched off. I am really scared.
My gf told me about her married cousin letting her self be shared by her husband. I was really interested because her cousin is a beautiful women! I couldn’t believe she would do such a thing! She told me all the details ! Like how her husband took her out and let her pick up on a random guy to take home. She made it seem like she enjoyed it! It made me think she wanted to try it the way she told the story. When I asked her she denied any interest in it. My gf by the. Way is equally attractive. She’s got a very pretty face and a tight little body. Recently we had gone dancing and she was getting hit on by a few guys. I let her flirt as much as she wanted . That night she ended up giving a random guy a blowjob. I could tell she liked it. I took her back home and we talked about her getting fucked by someone else. Finally one night she got all dolled up and told me she was going out with her girls. She looked amazing more than usual! Around 2am she calls me to pick her up. When I get there she is holding hands with another guy! She pulls him into the car and introduced him to me. He was a very handsome man in his late 40’s. He didn’t know who I was and asked if I could drop them off at his house. I stayed quite and took him there. She was giggling and moaning the whole ride there. They jumped out and she thanked me . Asked if I could wait for her for about an hr. I saw her walk into this guys house and began to imagine what they were doing. I waited for about 3 hrs . She finally came out and got in the front . She looked nothing like she did when she left the house. She gave me a hug and thanked me for being so open with her. I didn’t know what to say! I had a million questions and no answers. When we got home she jumped straight in the shower . I laid in bed waiting for her to arrive . I asked her how was it? She giggled and said amazing! I asked her if she would do it again and before I could finish she shouted out yes! She told me how he she stripped for him and his guest . How they all loved how beautiful she was ! I asked her if she slept with more than one guy and she said yes! They took turns on her at first then got her to agree to fuck two at a time . I couldn’t believe it! She loved it! I later found out she had done meth with them and eventually became hooked. At first I enjoyed it then I hated her for it. We eventually broke up .
A neighborhood girl (12) was going around bullying the other kids and trying to act "cool" claiming she drank and smoked and drugged all the time (you know the type) i gained this knowledge from my 10 year old niece who was one of the girls bullied, well i decided to she needed a lesson, coming from the background i did i was able to aquire a small amount of meth, the bully always carried around this knockoff purse, so i went to speak with her about bullying my niece (knowing full well she would just be a little twat) well as she was running her mouth i casually dropped the baggie of dope in the purse she had set on the bench, i walked a block away abd called the cops and tipped in that a minor was in possesion of drugs at the park, she waa arrested, charged with a felony and did six months in juvie, i later heard she was constantly getting beat up for running her mouth in there, even though it was a horrible thkng to do shes now no longer a cunt and is even doing better in school.
I have been snorting meth close to 5 years now, more recently ive increased my intake, think i want to end my useless life i can't any longer. Lost so much in the past 2 years. Beginning of the month I was constructively fired. What next? Think I'd settle for a coffin thank you. Tuned 33 yesterday and i don't want to see or go through any more of this.
im 17, my mom is a drug attict but i love her to death, she does heroin, and crack, this year 2016, i started to do herion somtimes and smoke crack sometimes, i just started because i have triedd other drugs just for the experience but i wonderd why my mom does heroin and cack all the time.. now i know the reason, but anywayone day i got a bag of heroin from my mom, she is aware i do it somtimes. anyway, i do this bag of heroin and i felt amazing, all i rember is closing my eyes, apperently i was dead, my body was purple from no oxygen and i wasnt breathing so my mom and my bestfriend who was there but she didnt know i was on drugs, they called the ambuence and they had to stick somthing up my nose so i can start breathing again, i woke up in the hospital and once i was told that i was dead i flipped out, i actually want to die, anyway after that i stopped for a while but now i do it again, yesterday night i did 2 bags of dope, the first one i did about 8pm, i didnt really feel what i wanted by 9pm so i did another one, about 20 min later i was smoking a blunt of weed with my sister and i wasnt feeling good at all, my head felt ike it was going to explode, so i put the blunt out and went into my house, i said goodnight to everyone and to her, i went in my room and i already knew i was overdosing, i tried so hard to keep myself awake because i didnt want to die so randomly, like i wasnt ready, i kept myself up untill 3 am and then finally said fuck it and went to bed, i woke up fine buti just been thinking since then.. why didnt i just lt it happen, maybe i want to live?.. idk but i really want to do it again and end it,,
My brother is an abusive drug addict and alcoholic. I believe he is also mentally ill. I enable him to buy drugs because it’s the only time he acts like a normal person. Nobody knows what my life is really like.
I smoke crack. I snort rails. I lost my last two jobs and I live off my best friend. I do drugs at her house when she’s not home. I spent all my money on crack. My ex tried saving me and I told people he hit me. I failed. I lie, I cheat, I steal. I’m a shitty person. An addict, a closet addict. I stole from friends and I’ve reached a point where I do drugs alone. I stopped paying my car I don’t pay rent. I need help. I’m fucked in the head. I never used to be this deep. I’ve lost everything even the love of my life due to drugs.
#liar #addict #confession #drugs
I accidentally got my high school girlfriend pregnant.
She was 15 and I was 16. We were both into the drug culture of our high school and were very commonly having unprotected sex.
I have been an uncle since the age of 3 and have had a job since I was 14. I wasn't affraid of having a child. My mother was angry, but supportive. At 16, I was ready to become a dad.
The day had come when my girlfriend would have our baby girl. I was very excited. Her parents and the rest of family blocked me from the hospital. I was told our child didn't make it.
Jump ahead 35 years and I find out through an anonymous letter. My daughter is a live and well. She is living on Long Island. She thinks I am the one that is dead.
Now I have now decide whether to tell her I am alive or make believe she doesn't exist.
My naked confession... a few years ago, I was in an acquaintance's apartment in Toronto. A few young guys were there too.
I admit, I was smoking crack. Which makes me want to get naked. Which I did, so a bit later, I, middle aged guy, was walking around completely naked hitting the pipe, to these guys' astonishment. This was very cool, I thought.
They asked for some. I said "no, it's only for naked people".
It took them a while... but these two guys, late teens, early twenties, undressed completely, and a bit later we were all naked, getting high. They were embarrassed. At least one erection was seen.
I like mixing drugs and sex. I love to snort cocaine off a naked girls body while my husband rails me from behind. And sex on ecstasy is out of this world. It makes our orgies so much better. Sometimes I even smoke a bong when it's just me and my husband. I also do lines of coke occasionally. I don't think I'm addicted or anything. It's not like I do it every day, or even every week. But it's nice just to let loose and have fun sometimes.
I'm young but old enough to know for the last 15 months how I have let myself be dominated and humiliated by Lewis who I regretfully moved in with 2 years ago. He is 14 years older than me but kind at first. The first sign of his dominating obsession started with spankings he forced on me causing welts on my behind and inflicting pain. He built a table in the basement where he would tie me down on my back with my feet tied to boards where my knees were bent up with legs wide open and fully exposed to him. He insists on shaving my pubic hair then tortures my vagina and anus with sex toys including vibrators and butt plugs. He always has me snort drugs or smoke weed first and supplies me with oxycodone. After abusing me as I'm still laying there with my legs wide open he will either have intercourse, oral or anal sex with me. He takes me to the basement usually two nights during the week or whenever he wants to. I'm usually high but still aware of what he does to me. The first five or six weeks after he made up that table were bad enough but since then he has humiliated me further having his brother and three other friends here at different times. He not only lets them see me like that but also allows them to use the sex toys on me. He also forces me to give these guys oral sex and as I lay there. I am at his mercy and yet he is able to have me orgasm many times which I can't help. Most of the time there is only one of the other guys here but sometimes there are two of them and even though I am high on the drugs I am in tears with humiliation and shame. Its even humiliating when these guys just stop over for a beer. I want to leave Lewis but have no money and no where to go. Its like being a slave to him but I am so hooked on the drugs right now I can't do anything about it.
I want to start doing drugs again. But all my old suppliers are either dead or in jail or got clean. I miss the feeling of being in la la land.
I have lived my entire life in fear of black ppl. I was taught they are evil terrible mean ppl so I steered as far as possible from them. In school I wouldn't talk to them or even make eye contact with them. I was pertified at thier presence. I graduated high school got married not long after and had 4 boys and I taught them as I was taught to refrain from getting involved with black ppl at all cost. They took our advice as racist as it was and didn't socialize with no black person to date but my youngest son Daniel was the exception. He got into the rap and saggy pants and of course the drugs. It started with marijuana and now he's a full blown meth head. He quit school and did basically what he wanted to do and his dad had to do 2 years in the Middle-East and my son would get soo strung out he would do anything for money. We had to cut him off finiacially and he stayed gone for weeks then he would call in soo much debt with his dealer that we would bail him out to keep them from hurting him. We put him in rehabs until we had to declare bankruptcy. My husband risked his life for his country everyday over there and Daniel bankrupting us was a big slap is my husband's face. He was discouraged and blamed himself for not being home to deal with Daniel but the biggest hit was yet to come. I got a call from a man that tells me Daniel is in big trouble and he needs my help so I go find him just where the man told me he was and I bring him home with me. We were home maybe 20 to 30 minutes when the door bell rang and as I answered the door I was pushed backwards by a black guy who had 3 other black guys with him. He asked me where Daniel was? I told him he was getting a shower and he would be finished shortly but he wasn't waiting and he sent his 3 guys to pull him out of the shower and they threw him down in the living room floor wet and naked. I was embarrassed as a mother would be in the situation and grab a throw off the back of the sofa to Daniel and he covered himself. Daniel was out of it so I spoke up and said I take it Daniel owes you money,right. The leader says "hell yeah he owes me money and I want it,right now." I ask him how much does he owe you and he blew me away when he said $3,100.00. I did not have that kind of money. I only had $900.00 and most of that was bill money for utilities. I told him I didn't have that kind of money and he threatened to hurt Daniel right now. I begged him to please not hurt him that I would sell my car and everything I have to come up with the money. He asked me if I would sell myself and I was confused at the statement and responded with the only word I could think of at the time and that was "what! " He tells me he didn't studder. He rephrased the question and said, "would you give up that fine ass to spare your son's life" Still stunned by what I was hearing I hesitantly said "you know I would". He said good that's what we will do then,you can work his debt off and we can start right now and commands me to undress. Omg,this was happening my biggest fears had come true because not only am I conversing with this black dealer but now he's wanting sex with me. I look at Daniel as I undress and this black bastard takes my wrist and forces me to my knees and puts his dick in my mouth and he disrespecting me the whole time with the typical ghetto lanuage and he lays me on the sofa and he gets real aggressive as he really thrust into me and I do orgasm and they take turns with me then they lead me to this Escalade and for 4 days I am constantly fucked with very little sleep until my son's debt is paid. I had to tell my husband everything I thought is was the right thing to do and it was but I left out an important part that I kept secret and that was that I realized I was able to payoff $3,100.00 dollars of debt in just 4 days. Sex is something I enjoy and with my husband overseas I felt deprived of it and the money is great. My husband barely makes $3,100.00 for a whole month so I turned to prostitution to aleviate two problems I was dealing with which was loneliness and debt and I didn't have a problem with selling my body to get what I wanted. Grant it I wouldn't have turned to prositution had Daniel followed his brother's footsteps and stayed straight but there is a silver lining in every cloud and one such silver lining if you can call it that is that I am not longer racist or scared of black ppl and do have quite a few black clients that I service weekly and bi-weekly. After Daniel was forced to watch his mom with these 4 blacks thugs and witnessing the extreme measures that I was willing to go thru to protect him,Daniel got clean and is doing very well. My husband finally got state side and I told him of my exploits into prostitution and how I was still doing it. He wasn't happy. He said that he understood what I did to protect and save our son Daniel but he doesn't understand why I continue doing it. I told him exactly how lonely I was and the money is great. He asked me to quit being he's home and could attend to the loneliness issue and he could do that but now I'm enjoying the men,the sex and the money too much. I tell him I still love him that hadn't changed but over these years I have changed. He agreed that I had changed alright,changed into a whore then asked me what happened to the beautiful loyal woman he married? He tells me he does love me but can't live this way and throws this guilt trip on me that this is what he gets for serving his country. I explain to him that I would love to stay with him and the decision to leave me would be his,not mine. He didn't even stay the night and went to a motel and ironically picks up a hooker off the street and when awakes the next morning the hooker is gone and he realizes there is no attachment between a prostitute and her Johns and he comes back tells me everything and he will accept my new found profession. We are out of debt and doing great. We now have a vacation home on the lake which we go to nearly every weekend where we go boing,fishing,swimming and it's fun. I never thought soo much good could come from a situation soo tragic and I guess you can say that life gave us some lemons and we turned it into lemonade. Life is good these days and my family is strong. My kids know are the greatest and we have not hid any of the events of our story from them and they aren't ashamed of me for doing what I did which I would've done for them all. They tell me I'm thier hero which is kind of strange seeing thier dad risked his life in service of our country and they do respect his sacrifice but they credit me with defending and saving our family and I'll take that with a smile and happy heart. I did sacrifice alot but in the end I'd do it again. Business has been booming even more so ever since I started taking on female clients and couples. Who knew little ole me could've done 180 degree turn where the things I once condemned and considered vile is now my life's work and passion. Truly sex sells and I'm cashing in it. Who knows maybe some of you reading my story will find thier calling in life thru some strange or maybe some terrible chain of events but either way I call it destiny. My destiny to bring joy to soo many ppl looking for just a release from the day to day stresses thru sex is self fulfilling. May God bless you all to find peace and happiness. Muah.
#shameless #drugs #weed #confession
I am a 32 year old blue collar family man, but I am personally responsible for the murder of three people. The first is known and is public record. The second and third occurred during my five-year stint in a drug trafficking ring. They were both friends of mine, but addicted to methamphetamine. Their addictions caused my kingpin to lose a large amount of money. I gave them both poisoned meth, which they injected. I later went to jail for my part in the trafficking ring, but my two friends were never found.
Lately I've had an intense desire to try drugs. I just want to be reckless and step out of the boundaries. Sometimes I think "f**k it". I think I'd really like to at least smoke weed. I even fantasize about f**king some random men to get drugs.
Many times I have thought about what it’s like to get high. Or be drugged. Or be drunk.
I can’t drink or take drugs. I have epilepsy and strong medication.
My first day of kindergarten, my teacher Mr.Joel says "Alright we are going on a field trip to the national park ,so I need a girls to board the bus first then boys!"
I wasn't paying attention and I got on the bus first. Mr Joel approached me and sarcastically ask."Excuse me Gregory, are you a girl or boy? "I don't know I said". That moment , that question confused the fuck out of me for the rest of my life. I mean i have a penis but I don't like to look at it because it looks icky. My mom was shitting on the toilet and I was standing in the doorway naked when I was 3 years old telling her I pooped my diaper and all she said was ah fuck not again just like fucking father and she slammed the door and my penis got caught in between it. I screamed and my neighbors took me to the hospital because my mother refused to drive drunk and high. The doctors put ice on it and sent me home. But by the time we got home my mom was asleep so my neighbors made me sleep when there son picaru was two years older the me. I didn't sleep Much that night cause picaru kept sticking Lego's and a hot wheels cars up my butthole and he would tie string around my injured penis and attach to a fishing rod and he would yank hard and reel it up until the line broke. Everytime I screamed he told his parents I was having bad dreams so his dad took off my clothes and laid me on his lap in the living room while we both watched the entire Andy Griffith show season one all night. He didn't molest me or assault me but he did kiss me on the lips a lot and call me 'judy Ann' and 'honey' a lot. Judy Ann was his dead wife's name.fucked up part is the when he drove me to the hospital he hit my dog spider and he promised he would check on him once we got back. I never saw spider again :(.
#death #assault #abandoned #injury #abuse #drugs #trauma #transgender
As a kid I watched someone use drugs. They’d hallucinate. I said not me. When you see a person go from normal to screaming. Running from things not there. Hurting themselves and others. Not me.
Then I almost died. You wanna live? Take these meds. The meds led to new problems. New meds.
Then the meds caused PTSD. That led to more meds.
Well. One med made me hallucinate. I tried to escape I’m told. Can’t remember.
I do remember one med made me paranoid. This was compounded by a bad childhood and a real danger in our life. My wife tried to convince me the real danger was not real. But it was strange. It’s like when the TV preacher; radio DJ; newscaster. Well.
You now how in a movie they don’t look into the camera? That breaks the illusion your watching something real. You now realize the actor is looking at the audience. Hey. I’m an actor.
Well. On this med my mind would say. Did they just look at me? I didn’t run off screaming. I knew they really weren’t. I just felt like they were.
Off and on I’ve been thru stuff like that. Take this med. I don’t want to. But I never tell them about the side effect.
But I beat it. When I wasn’t on such meds. I called some shows. Heard myself. Had others do it. Heard them. See now they really were to me and others. One liked me so much I met them. Took pics. Me and others. They remember. Got the pics. So it’s real.
Well they’ve had me on said meds again. Can’t sleep. Paranoia. But I beat it. I called some shows. Broke the spell. I went thru. Heard me talking to me. Delayed of course.
Oh. I’m still feeling that itch; nervous; hot cold; sick to stomach; shaky; nervous stuff. I hate these meds. But I now know it’s paranoia. I altered the show. Made them talk to me. Heard it delayed.
Then I did the greatest thing you can do to paranoia. I hung up. Changed channels. Put on a movie. Said I don’t care who thinks what about me. I’m a good person. They can laugh at me. But I can laugh at them too. F them. It’s nothing personal. I just have to live within what meds are doing to me.
So it’s fading. Losing its hold on me. I’ll wait a week or two. Then slowly listen again. If it’s just a show I’ll stay. If not two more weeks.
I may have to take these meds to stay alive longer. But I don’t have to let the side effects control my life.
Because I'd like to be able to do baking, I bake a lot in the last weeks. Last weekend, I made bread, but instead of oregano, I put some of my weed in the dough. Didn't notice it at first but my daughter (she's 9) ate some of the bread for breakfast, I soon noticed that something was wrong.
I really should stop smoking pot.
#daughter #pot #weed #break #beaking #dough #confession #drugs
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