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I don't know what to do anymore..... Life is so confusing for a man who has nothing in this world and is only getting dimmer and dimmer instead of better like in those fucking tales you see on movies or happy ending books. My mom is a pain who can't even understand how mentally fucked I am dealing with stress she has entailed onto me about how she cant get a job and is relying on me and my sister to take it all in control. This life is no different compared to her as she had to struggle doing the same thing with her mom before that, however this is of new age and of new thinking. It as well concluded to me that I have depression that has a rise over the years due to this family finance as well distress from just an 18 year old still trying to find himself. I found that suicidal thought have became more creative as I become sad where its me blowing my brains out in front of everyone and saying goodbye to jumping off the state bridge and sending off a worldwide video describing to help those in needs such as I am and in hope that they can learn from my mistakes and no not follow in these barbaric and sorrowful steps of a "human". I've been called worse then human such as "idiot" "stupid" "dumbass" to my so called friend..... and even to family members. Another part of me that wants to come out is how my dead beat excuse of a human dad just essentially is homeless and somewhere out doing drugs and such still living to his glory and essentially created this whole black whole of mess.
In this end there is also an answer that I still hope that anyone who stumbles upon this website may enlighten and please tae into recognition...... "YOU ARE NOT ALONE".... It's hard and horrible but all I can say and to keep tings short is that you are not alone and understand that we, me you, whatever it may be can get through this. From writing this out it helped me alleviate some pain physically and mentally and started me back to the engine that could. So please anyone who has eyes and ears, don't be afraid to talk to someone or write out your expressions cause trust me you are in most definitely not alone. Hope this can help someone like me or anyone in trouble. Thank you.
I like to be alone. Or don't I? Do I actually despise it? Do I crave more human interaction and just deny myself of that fact? I think of myself as quite the lone wolf. And I thought I'm fine with that.. Realisation hits now.. It's hitting me hard. Slapping the fact in my face that I've never been able to keep the people in my life that I wanted to keep in it. I hide the fact that I'm quite toxic, or can be quite toxic, behind telling myself and others that I'm an ideal lone wolf.. And that I'm okay with it. But am I? I don't know that for a fact. I guess I'm not. I like to think of myself as an introverted empath. Maybe I'm an extroverted, choleric aashole in reality..
I use two numbers. I'm on a whole new level of being a single 29 year old male(virgin).
Average looks. 6 feet tall. A little plummy.
Always being friendzoned.
I chat with these two numbers pretending to be a couple.
There. I've said it.
I've been really bad for a while, I've tried reaching out for help but nothing is happening, I'm still bad, I think I'm just giving up, I dont want to but I don't think I can stop it anymore.
I just wanna be in a happy loving relationship when I'm alone I feel empty and pointless when ever I meet someone I Bury myself in them and my whole life basically revolves around them, then after a month I get bored self destructive and the relationship ends (on my end) I'm worried that the relationships that ended when I was still, I guess in love with the other person where my only chances at true love and I fucked them up, I can't be alone I can't stand it I feel trapped just I need someone to love me cuddle me and force themselves on me when I feel bored and never leave me when I love them I just wanna be happy
It's been a rough day and I feel so alone. I wish I didn't. I wish I knew someone could see it and cared but no one does, I've gotten very good at hiding it from everyone...
I have to get this off my chest... I am female and 35 years old and I am lonely. All my friends are in a relationship, have kids and a family to take care of and I sit here all alone with no one to talk to. I am the only single in my whole group of friends and it makes me sick. I would like to go out on the weekend, meet friends and socialize but no one has time for me and I only get excuse after excuse after excuse. I went out and met friends like 2 times the last 5 months!
It got really bad I decided to sign up on Tinder and other dating sites. I was feeling like shit a couple of weeks ago and tried to talk to my best friends. And what happened? No one answered my texts or calls until after the weekend.
I met someone on Tinder and seriously thought about meeting up with him even though I knew that he would be bad for me. But rather this than sitting home alone and suffering.
I have a good job, do not look that bad and I am actually fun to be around. And still.
And fuck my friends, those are no true friends to me anymore!!!
Thank you for letting me share this.
I have a tendency to push away people. I lost all emotions, my heart turned cold, I lost interest in a lot of things. Sometimes i feel alone. I've been trying to figure out why. I Just can't find the answer.
It's made me angry, but it's made me afraid, because I loved you, I love you, and now I'm scared of the people I don't know because I don't know them, and the people I love because I want to be close but if I get close to them then they can get close to me, and no, no, no, don't come close to me, don't touch me, go far, far away, I don't want to see you, but if I can't see you then I can't see you coming, and why can't you understand that there's a difference between trust and forgive because I forgive you and love you but because of you I can never trust you or anyone ever again and I still check under my bed and out my window, and check that I've locked my bedroom door more times than the front door, and I want to get out of here because here's where it happened, but out is where you are and I don't want to go where you are and I'm so lonely, lonely, lonely but I'm scared because I love you.
I hate God. He let me endure horrors. Yet I was good. I served others. I saved lives. But no matter what I did He just took it all away. So I’m done with Him. I’m kinder than He is. He does not deserve me as His son. He is not worthy of me. I don’t want Him anymore.
I accept that I am alone. Go love yourself God. You never loved me.
Hey those who are reading this I want to confess that I am so bad i have mad my sister cry my mom told me that she is died for me and my family don’t want to be as a part..they don’t want to enjoy my milestone as I have succeeded 3k followers on my food blog page I want to die💔I don’t have any best friend or friend to whom I can talk I am alone
I am depressed. I am the at the point of depressed where I can't bother to get out of bed and I would not at all mind if an asteroid killed us all off. Because then it would be over. I want it to be over. Don't get me wrong I am not suicidal. I was born into little, gained just a little more over my 22 years of life. I am overweight and haven't had a single girlfriend in 2 years of a single romantic advance or interest from the opposite sex ever since. I try so much to gey people to like me. Try so much to keep conversations alive and interesting but I dawns on me those people always choose to spend their time and love on other people. I don't know they may be amazing but God does it hurt soooo much. I am not ugly or unfit despite my slight chubbiness. I am quite good looking anf that is not my personal opinion I actually got accepted in that good looking people only dating site. Why am I so alone? why is no one interested in loving me or even getting to know me? Why am I so constantly alone?. Why do I have to cry myself to feeling better every other week?
I love watching anime without my gf. She asks too many questions. Plus I faintly feel like she fakes her interest in things that interest me.
I don't know why, but im not sad or depressed about never haveing sex or even been in a relationship.
Im a 22m that I guess doesn't look to bad I don't really know but people think im 15 or 17. Either way, I think about sex and masterbate all the time to say the very least, I think about just plowing girls from behind and grabbing their hair well they scream my name and etc. etc. My life isn't filled with sadness or bad things like other people have had, im just super aquard nerdy guy trying to experience sex or just be in a loving relationship and I know it sounds counter intuitive to what I said before I just feel kinda in a weird spot right now where I haven't met anyone yet or even someone likeing me in any real way, I just feel kinda left out either because I'm a goofball at talking to people or me just being really aquard.
I’m dependent on my boyfriend for income and we live together in our house. I love him but I’m so unhappy. I don’t know what to do anymore. I try to just forget how I feel and be positive about everything but it’s so hard to shove all of my feelings to the back of my mind. When I do say how I feel I end up being the bad guy because I get so angry and frustrated or I break down into a sobbing mess. When the ladder happens he apologizes and promises to change but then nothing ever does. It’s not like all of the things he does separately are deal breakers but when you lump it all together it just feels like so much and I can’t can’t handle it. I am so lost and hurting and there’s nothing I can really do about it
#relationships #struggle #dependent #heartbreak #love #alone
I have autism. I am alone every day. God does not love me. I try to glow for others. But I’m so sick.
I put 95% of the effort with people I consider friends. I realize now that I don't really have that many people in my life who care enough to check in.
#lonely #friendship #life #alone
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