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Read the best #suicide confession stories
I confess, I've always been a very apathetic person. I've never actually given two shits about anything, and am constantly talking to my psychiatrist about this. It has progressed more with my manipulative nature and become a monster. I constantly catfish sensitive people, male and female, the ones I figure have the most mental problems. I shake them down, tear down their walls and become their everything's. I play it off like I'm innocent. That I'm the one who needs the protecting. Then, I destroy them from the inside out . I watched one guy blow his own brains out after I asked him to. I told him, that if he loved me, he'd do it. I continue to do things like this today. And to be honest, I don't regret any of it.
I lie about everything. I lie to my teachers, I lie to my friends, I lie to my family. I don't want them to know that I am not ok. I don't want them to worry. I don't want them to know that this is the worse I have ever been. I don't want them to know that I think about suicide everyday.
I am with my boyfriend whose tried to kill himself three times, I love him but I also want to leave him because I feel like I'm trapped. But I know if I leave he will kill himself. I'm so scared but I don't know what else to do because I value his life and I love him.
I'm a 20 year old guy. I've been with my girlfriend for 3 years. We're unbelievably close and have basically planned out lives together. But I can't help but feel that she's not the one. I've had a few drunken kisses with a few girls and a one night stand with a close friend. None of which she knows about, and all of them I feel terrible about. I know if I tell her she'll dump me. But I also know (almost for sure) that if we break up she will kill herself. I obviously don't want that to happen but I can't help but think about other girls.
Dear ex boyfriend, I hope you find peace in heaven and love I couldn't give you when you were alive. Sorry for making you feel like a shit...now I am here feeling like shit myself, I wish I could do something to bring you back to me, but unfortunately I can't. I am hurt because I loved you too...I still do it's just that I didn't know how to show it. Forgive me if you can....I will always love you even though you are not here with me, but your memories are.
Sometimes I consider attempting suicide just because on the off chance someone cares enough to save me, I might finally get the help I need. I'm cripplingly lost. No job, no family, no school, no future. I don't feel able to live the life that's necessary for me to be happy. I wish I were dead.
I need to confess.
I've never asked for much in my life. Just to be happy. I can't seem to ever find it though. Every time I do it always ends up being fake. I hate that so much. But a while back I found happiness in a girl. She was everything I've ever wanted and more. I devoted my life to keeping her happy and I did everything to do so. We were inseparable, or so I thought. One day, not too long ago in fact, she decided to just throw away all we worked so hard to achieve.
I was so devastated I tried to kill myself numerous times. When my knives were finally taken away I looked up key points on my veins and took thumbtacks to each point. Several at a time too. The pain was unbearable and I thought it would work. It didn't obviously. People saw the scars and finally I got help. I was gone for a few days but it felt like a lifetime. When I finally got out of where I was I felt better but not helped. I still have thoughts of death and suicide and am having them now as I type these words. The scars serve as my own permanent reminder of what I went through. Everyone wants me to promise never to do it again...but these promises have been made in vain....
I told my ex boyfriend that I would commit suicide if he don't come back to me.
That was a lie of course. I love life too much as to through it away so easily.
Im 18 and i hate myself, i always have, i was born the youngest sibling and i was always the most annoying brat in the world, I couldn’t stop myself i had no self control from irritating everyone around me, it drove my mother to the point of beating me when i was 7, recently i was diagnosed by a doctor for having manic bipolar disorder and depression, i find i can never enjoy myself in social situations, i have a girlfriend but i dont want her to be with me anymore, I’m not the person i used to be.. i never was. I just want to finish, life is just day after day of agony and pain.
I cant make sense anymore. My brain is fucked!!
I have a hard time forgiving my parents. They love to tell you at random times that they would always support you no matter what, but when I failed to deliver my thesis on time (now i have to redo a semester) instead of supporting me they kept makeing me feel guilty about it and how this was all my fault. Also when i told them I wouldn't visit my grandparents on vacaition because I wanted to go to the pychologist they made me feel even more guilty, saying I was selfish and this was stupid. Ok so they had no idea I literally cried myself to sleep for a couple of weeks after the thesis thing but they were far from anything they ever boast about they'd do. I sometimes like to fantasize that I kill myself and leave a letter telling my family that it's not entirely their fault, but they definitely had a major part in it.
Sometimes I write suicide notes and hide them in my room until I can leave them on my desk before I overdose on pills.
I attempted suicide during the pandemic I thought life could not get any better. I still have back problems.
my ex wife cheated, I confronted her and kicked her out of the house. I set up my rifle and watched this guy eat lunch. I had the rifle on his head and safety off, my finger on the trigger and pressing. I came very close to shooting him but knew I would be found.
I planned a set up where I would tie her in a chair and make her watch as I executed her family one by one. The only thing that saved them was my love for her little sister. She thought of me as a father figure and did not deserve to die.
I thought of suicide myself and just ending it all.
I did not kill anyone and just found someone new. I have a great wife I can trust and children I am very proud of.
I'm a 21 year old gay male. Decent looking.
Anyway this starts all the way back in elementary school, I always felt different. I was the odd kid out and often picked on but if you were to look at me there would be no obvious reason. I was clean, looked normal but I was always off, this is when the horrible pattern started. I had met this kid, let's call him Cody, anyway we hit it off at first when school started because he was the new kid and I was a loner and we bonded over just running around at recess because neither of us liked sports (or ever were invited to play) and the swing set. As the year went on I thought everything was fine and normal, his mom even started volunteering at the school to serve snacks for the students which had given me a chance to meet his mom which I thought was great until i got pulled into the office one day. I was told that I was being suspended for harassing another student, it turns out Jake was deeply afraid of me and my vivid imagination, so afraid that he had pretended to be my friend so he wouldn't get hurt. His mom volunteered at the school to even keep an eye on me so she can see for herself what was going on. That's when I really knew something was wrong with me and what sickens me is that this exact same pattern of me finding one person and developing a dangerous fixation on them, my intent is never to harm them but I do... never physically but I'm so insecure in everything about myself. I need to pick a fight with them just to know that they care enough to argue back. I make up a sad story or suicide attempt to see how much they love me. I constantly push these boundaries to test how much they will take and if they will hurl me out of their lives too. This pattern has slowed down but not in a healthy way, ive now turned to opiates to give me that feeling of euphoria I would get when someone would say something nice to me or give me a hug. I'm up to about 160-200 mg of oxycodone use a day which I guess is enough to kill someone without a tollerance and everyday I wish I wouldn't wake up from my nod. When this isn't enough I turn to casual sex on grindr just so I can still feel sexy and desired, I never use condoms because I hope I get HIV, that'll kill me in a few years if I don't treat it hopefully. Oh I should also mention that the only person that ever loved me unconditionally no matter how bad I got died of cancer when I was 19, the same time my "fiancé" left me. He was actually pretty good at dealing with my crazy, he knew how to work around it but after losing my mom I got really bad. Wanna know what's funny? I have a high paying job! I'm really smart and manipulative so I was able to cheat a resume and land a 30$ an hour job, I just pretended I knew what was going on lol I've even bought a car recently. I have this random peaks of energy and sanity I think where I set a goal and then I work hard to acheieve it, all while hiding a drug addiction. This isn't easy to do but any addict can tell you that they'll figure something out to push them through the day. As you can see this is so haphazardly written because this is how my brain works, I'm never on a single path and do you want to know the sickest thing that torments me the most in my life? I love. I love so hard. I love everyone and everything. All I want to do is love each and every person on this earth and i know that I have enough compassion in my heart to go around to each one of you but with my deadly desire to be desired like that in return all I do is hurt anyone who crosses my path. I've stopped now. I even got on methadone to start saving up a chunk of money for my family and entered the methadone clinic who dose me every morning before work, then I go to my office, milk the fuck out of the clock, go home, pop some xanax or whatever drug I can get my hands on because I have stockpiled fake pee for the UA's and pass the fuck out. On my days off it's just a blur of some type of intoxication. The beauty of this is, I'm no longer harming anyone, I tell my family I'm just dedicated to my career and they believe me because they see the new diesel (used 2011) Ford Dually I bought. I'm not in emotional pain for the lack of not having human interactions. My account is growing slowly but since I don't pay rent I can put almost half my monthly income into savings. I've written a list of the names of all the people I've hurt and for each name is a letter telling them everything that's beautiful about them. In 6 more months (if my body can hold up to my downers at night and daytime stimulants) I'll leave on a positive note with my dads debt paid off and my brother a newer truck which he should be able to make the payments on with the way I got the loan set up. Fuck you guys I'm so sorry I've failed you all. I was supposed to be the one to take every tear and change it for you... there has never been a time when my compassion didn't bring joy to someone's face, in fact that's the only thing that's kept me here this long. Kill me if you want and can find out who posted this, it would help. Today is January 7th.. late July and the toxic creature that has infected our existence as a species will enter the void of nothingness. Damnit, I was supposed to be something so beneficial. Anyway, bye babes. You have my love - mine is not to reason why, yours is not to make reply for I am to do and die.
#insanity #death #suicide #fear #addiction #abandonment #loss
I can’t stop. Everything fucking hurts. I can’t sleep. I never stop hurting myself. Sometimes I don’t remember doing it and I wake up with cuts or burns.
I keep putting matches out on my hands, I cut, I put my hands into boiling water, I binge and then make myself throw up until I’m coughing up blood, and now I’m constantly thinking about stabbing my self, or cutting off my chest. (I’m FtM transgender). I can’t stop thinking about doing it. My chest is wrapped in bandages and duct tape. My ribs hurt so much but I can’t stop. I can’t stop.
#help #suicidal #selfharm #suicide #ftm #trans #ftmtrans #transgender #harm
Several years ago I purposely slit my wrist while cutting up boxes. I made it look like an accident. It did not bleed as I missed the vein. I got scared and rushed to the hospital to get stiches. I lied to the doctor about what happen to avoid going to see a therapist. I now have scar as a reminder. I guess it wasn't my time to go yet.
Every time I drive over a bridge. I just want to stop, walk over and jump and not be found.
End it now. Leave my worries behind.
I'm going to kill myself. I'm not sure when but I can feel my death stalking me every second of the day. I had a stroke at a pretty young age a few years ago. I didn't have any physical residual problems but emotionally I'm fried. I have a constant feeling of dread that lives deep in my gut, something that seems to be stuck inside my esophagus. Sometimes I feel ok, but thoughts of how I'm going to die are never far from my mind. I really want it to end.
I tried committing suicide tonight by overdosing and now i feel all weird like im here but im not here and idk if im dead or not
My confession is that i tried to kill myself.
Everything just got too much for me. I never told anyone about it so it's kinda big deal that i write this now.
tried to drown myself but in the end i hadn't had the guts to do it.
But i know now that i have to change something bcause it can't go on like this....
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