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I'm a 28 year male. I honestly can't tell you why I'm writing any of this aside from the fact that I still think about what happened years ago and still want to do it again, unshamefully.
I was 12-14 at the time when all this happened and when I found out that masturbation was awesome. I loved finding myself and feeling something that was "forbidden" in my household. I come from a large family, lots of siblings and lots of reglion in the house, and it was difficult as the youngest son to find the time to sneak away and have a go with myself. But, one of my friends, a year younger than me that I met at church...go figure..., were hanging out playing video games and making jokes about everything under the sun. I can't remember who instigated it but, one of us mentioned how cool it would be to feel 'better' when we did what we do when no one is looking. Before we know it, we are playing with each other and trying to 'feel better'. We started by watching each other while we masturbating at first, it was a thrill and made us feel way better. Then we figured we would try with our mouths. It was the best feeling I had ever felt up till that point. Having someone else do the work and feel even more ecstasy than if I did it myself. One day, while at church, we found that the back part of one of the buildings with multiple classrooms was totally vacant and all the lights were out. We figured, why not? So we played around and took turns. When I "got there" he pulled back and got really mad because he thought I peed in his mouth.... I hadn't... it was the first time I had actually ejaculated. At the time I was excited and happy that I was maturing, but also scared because I loved the way it felt and how dangerous it was to do such a thing in a house of worship! Lol. We continued this for a few years, slowly developing into young men and having girlfriends, But we always had that to ourselves, our "feel better" time.
One day, he came over and as usual, we played video games and watched movies we loved. Of course, everyone goes to bed and it's just us, up late, talking, and he says,"You wanna try something different?" To which I got excited but confused. What could we do that we haven't done? He goes and gets a towel, some shampoo, and says,"Let's try something." Before I knew it, he was on his stomach with the towel under him and started putting shampoo between where his thighs met (gooch/taint). He says,"Just don't put it in me. Just through to legs, ok?" I cautiously kneel and, rockhard, place my manhood right where the shampoo was. It felt amazing... I came in less than 5 mins. I felt so amazing, it was rediculous. He said,"Was it good?" To which I responded,"Dude...amazing! You gotta try it!" I took his position, lathered up, and was ready. Same thing. He came really fast and we had a laugh at how we beat the "system" as teenagers lol.
Once again, this went on for a while, and were loving the fact that we had a way to make ourselves feel good and it still didn't break too many rules. After a few times of doing this we got together on the fateful night when we found out it could feel even better. We had the house to ourselves and he gave me the look. I go and grab a towel and some lotion, some kinds of shampoo made it burn sometimes, and came back to the room. We discuss who would go first and I lost the game of rock-scissors-paper, so I assumed the position. He asked if he could try something. I, hesitantly say yes, and he goes for my hole. Scared, excited, frighten, and invigorated, he slowly put it in. It burned a little but it felt strangely good. He pumped a few times and pulled out. I quickly, and as silently as I could, said,"You didn't come in me, did you?" He didnt. He was just as scared as I was and came on my ass. I was still invigorated and excited, he took the position. I wasn't planning on trying it at first cause I didn't want to hurt him but he insisted. So, I slowly put it in and it was the mouth times a million. As I am about to come 10 mins or so later, he says, weezing, "Do it, just do it in me." I did. It was the craziest and best feeling I had ever felt. I couldn't move. I just laid there throbbing inside him. We got up and cleaned ourselves. We didn't do this ever again after that. Not because we didn't want to, but because we became step brothers shortly after....
We don't see each other often, mainly holidays and family events. Neither of us mention it or even talk about it. I still wish I had that connection though. It's strange when you trust someone that much to not tell anyone about your secret dealings and recreational fun, but it still is a great memory, even if it's weird as all hell. Totally taboo yet, secretly, still an amazing life experience.
I cant believe i dropped out of university and ended up this broke with all the miseries that followed, i cant believe it
I know my boyfriend spies on me and is part of research groups that do global social experiments on me. I also let him mistreat me.
Once when I was 11 I thought it would be cool if I made my cat "fly", next thing I know I'm telling my mom she fell off the back of the chair and we are driving to the vet. Turns out she was fine and just had a rock in her foot and that's why she was limping.
I'm angry all the time over how arrogant and stupid my mother is. I just want to punch her in the throat. My mother blames everyone else for all her problems. She’s the one that ignores ever single warning about her fantastic life choices or who to trust. Then when things go south it’s OBVIOUSLY not her fault. Like my cousin, who is a notorious con artist AND has scammed her out of money in the past. She ignored every red flag and decided to buy a car from him. A car that she hadn’t even looked at before buying.That he insisted be paid in cash. It’s been 2 years and she hasn’t seen that car that supposedly exists. Yes, my cousin is an ass hat. However if my mother even listened to other people for once in her life she might see that she’s partially to blame. Maybe she might even make better choices in life if she paid attention to other people’s opinions and beliefs instead of living in her own world of denial and aggressive narcissism. But until that day comes, which it wont, it’s everyone else’s fault.
#family #familyissues #narcissism #stupidpeople #cantacceptblame #neverwrong #anger #punchingpeople
I always have the desire to do something stupid to make myself look brave. I don't know how that started, but I soon noticed that I got the attention I need by doing something reckless and stupid. Last week, I jumped in front of a moving car to save a small frog and I was almost hit. The driver of the car couldn't believe how stupid I acted because I didn't want to apologize for it. Two months ago, I jumped into a lake near my hometown, even though I can't swim. I just need the adrenaline and I need the attention.It's like an addiction and I know, someday, maybe tomorrow, maybe next week, I going to die because of it.
#audacity #bravery #stupid #die #confession #offmychest #swimming
When I was younger and had no general idea of racism, I once asked my mother: "Why are they called black if they're brown?"
I confess I don’t know how to talk to girls.
#lonely #frustrated #mad #bored #sex #judgemental #been #a #while #stupid #ex
My brother and I had a huge fight today. I even can't remember how it started but he kept saying bad things and I replied with even worse things. We fought our way through the whole house into the garden where I threw a hedge trimmer out of rage and anger.
Unfortunately this stupig thing hit my brother. On the head.
He had a really bad head injury requiring stitches.
I feel so bad right now. I didn't throw that thing on purpose at him! He's still in hospital right now. I hope he can forgive me.
#fight #brother #stupid #hedge #trimmer #stitches #hospital #confession
I hate my family. they're so mean and rude. they never care about me. my mom always beats me and yells at me and my stupid little brother learns from her. my dad is ok. I like my older sister and my two big brothers but my mom and my little brother are a pain. I just hate them.
I started smoking weed this year. I am not addicted. I don't get a lot and when I do get it. the times are very far away from each other. I think a lot. so when I get high i think more. it has gotten so bad. I think about life and death. everyday when I wake up. I wish I could go back because I think of everything too seriously. it's almost like I am on a never ending bad acid trip. I am only 17 so I have a lot of life left.
It's been over a year and three months since the last time we talk, but every day I think of him if he is alive or okay because I know he has been kicked out of house and lives on the streets. Like our story is so complicated and hard but I can't stop thinking about him and I don't know why like every guy I ever talk to my stupid brain and heart keep comparing them to the guy who I love so much and broke my heart. Part of me wants to contact him so badly like I did contact him to have closure but he thought I had closure of him and I thought the same way but I guess now because deep down inside of me my heart wants him. So my question is should I contact him again even though the last time we talk I tried to get closure....
I have a boyfriend but I went to my friends house for the night and we made out😰😰I feel rly bad now what do I
It started when I was 14, I was being bullied, and abused by my boyfriend, and not knowing who to turn to, or how to even explain what people were doing to me, I looked for a release. I found it in self-harming. For months no one knew what I was doing, then my boyfriend caught me. He began to abuse me even further. It progressed from one time a week, to every day, to 2-3 times a day. This went on for nearly 8 months when my boyfriend then committed suicide.
I took it for the worse and tried to OD. I got help but 2 months later I relapsed, then another 4 months after than I did again. This went on until I met my now boyfriend. To this day, two years later I still self-harm when I breakdown. But for now I have been 3 months free.
I wish I could live inside of my books. I want love to exist irl like it does in books. I have plenty of opportunities but I never take them because I'm never interested. I'm only interested in one person
I'm a guy and when I was 15, out of sheer curiosity, I shoved my mom's dildo which I found in her drawer cause I was damn stupid. It hurt and it was painful af :( lesson today kids is, don't do stupid shit no matter how horny you are
When I was younger and had no general idea of racism, I once asked my mother: "Why are they called black if they're brown?"
I remember when I was in the 4th grade and my crush use to touch my leg during class. Since I was sooo fucking dumb, I let him to touch me. Till this day, I haven’t told anyone yet. But I guess you guys know now….
It’s not a confess but I want some help. I’m a 19 year-old Middle Eastern girl who loves a 27 year-old Brazilian guy whom I met online in December 2018. He travels a lot and he sometimes talks about traveling to my country and meet me. I love him as I mentioned above but he never mentioned that he loves me or not he just told me twice that he “admires me” and told me once that he doesn’t feel the age gap between us, nothing more. The problem is that I understand that we are so different to be together, for example I follow a religion while he doesn’t and the cultural differences of course. What should I do with this love?
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