David Sedaris

I went from having 50 listeners to 50 million listeners. ↗

— David Sedaris

#i #listeners #million #went

I'm not a reporter but the 'New Yorker' treats everyone like a reporter. ↗

— David Sedaris

#i #like #new #new yorker #reporter

I've always been very upfront about the way I write, and I've always used the tools humorists use, such as exaggeration. ↗

— David Sedaris

#always #been #exaggeration #humorists #i

I've never gone on Facebook and am not sure I understand it. The same goes for Twitter. I have someone sending tweets and pretending to be me, but I don't know why. ↗

— David Sedaris

#facebook #goes #gone #i #know

If you read somebody's diary, you get what you deserve. ↗

— David Sedaris

#diary #get #read #somebody #you

Lovers of audio books learn to live with compromise. ↗

— David Sedaris

#books #compromise #learn #live #lovers

My sister Tiffany told me years ago, 'You can never write about me.' Then she called six months ago and said she wanted to be in a story. She was worried people thought I didn't like her. ↗

— David Sedaris

#ago #called #her #i #like

No one writes dialect better than Flannery O'Connor. No one should even try. ↗

— David Sedaris

#connor #dialect #even #should #than

People ask me, 'Have you ever considered doing stand-up?' To me it would be less offensive if someone asked me, 'Have you ever considered dental implants?' ↗

— David Sedaris

#asked #considered #dental #doing #ever

Sometimes I say to myself, 'Oh, I wish I could win a Tony Award', although I'm not that bothered. ↗

— David Sedaris

#award #bothered #could #i #i wish