#absurd

If I had eyebrows like two rainbows, I’d probably make love like a leprechaun. But it’s cool, because with that pot of gold, I’d have plenty of money to pay the prostitute.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #eyebrows #funny #gold #humor

I like using scented markers. Especially when I’m trying to color the inside of my nostrils. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #funny

I once made love to a taco shell stuffed with rancid meat and watery tomato bits. It was the best sex I’ve ever served to an unsuspecting customer. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #customer #dining #food #funny

The system of idolatry, invented by modern christianity, far surpasses in absurdity anything that we have ever heard of. ↗

— Orson Pratt

#anything #christianity #ever #far #heard

As we were walking home the other night, Orafoura turned to me and said, “Were you aware that there are places in the universe where time doesn’t exist?” “I know,” I replied. “That’s where I went to buy my last watch. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #orafoura #philosophical #ridiculous

Airport security is a particular bugbear. At the risk of sounding like a grumpy old man, while I can see that averting terrorism is manifestly important, the measures taken seem, simultaneously, absurd. ↗

— James Purefoy

#airport #grumpy #i #i can #important

Despite all the lunacy of the last century, all the absurdity of war and genocide, we believe that humans being are rational and are made to seek the truth. ↗

— Timothy Radcliffe

#being #believe #century #despite #genocide

The history of thought may be summed up in these words: it is absurd by what it seeks and great by what it finds. ↗

— Paul Valery

#finds #great #history #may #seeks

Maruman does not loll. ↗

— Isobelle Carmody

#accidental #cat #coincidence #funny #humor

A refuge is supposed to prevent what? The genes from flowing out of sight? This refuge idea won't stop insects from moving across boundaries. That's absurd. ↗

— Jeremy Rifkin

#across #boundaries #flowing #genes #idea