#absurd

Did you know you can drink food? It’s true! It’s called soup, and I eat it with a fork. I’m as efficient as the government.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#beuracracy #eat #efficiency #efficient #food

Blood may be thicker than water, but it's certainly not as thick as ketchup. Nor does it go as well with French fries. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #blood #crazy #culinary #food

I hate people who are not serious about meals. It is so shallow of them. ↗

— Oscar Wilde

#food #foodie #food

All right, You Great Git, You've asked for it. I'll cover the world in Tastee-Freez and Wimpy Burgers. I'll fill it with concrete runways, motorways, aircraft, television, automobiles, advertising, plastic flowers, frozen food and supersonic bangs. I'll make it so noisy and disgusting that even You'll be ashamed of Yourself! No wonder You've so few friends. You're unbelievable! ↗

— Peter Cook

#food

I told her that my happy yellow teapot has a kinky backstory involving a nineteenth-century vegetarian sex cult in upstate New York whose members lived for three decades as self-proclaimed "Bible communists" before incorporating into the biggest supplier of dinnerware to the American food-service industry, not to mention harboring their most infamous resident, an irritating young maniac who, years after he moved away, was hanged for assassinating President Garfield. ↗

— Sarah Vowell

#yay-history #food

I am three forks away from eating all your food with two homeless guys. It’s too bad I only have a suitcase full of spoons and a bucket of soy sauce.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#food #funny #homeless #humor #nonsense

Don Severo dropped his fork, Doña Remedios nearly chocked, but Jesús carried on playing with his food. He’d never really liked broccoli. ↗

— Olga Núñez Miret

#food

Please forgive me. My pedicurist had a stroke. She fell forward onto the orange stick and plunged it into my toe. It required bandaging. ↗

— Woody Allen

#forgiveness

If I convince myself that this life has no other aspect than that of the absurd, if I feel that its whole equilibrium depends on that perpetual opposition between my conscious revolt and the darkness in which it struggles, if I admit that my freedom has no meaning except in relation to its limited fate, then I must say that what counts is not the best living but the most living. ↗

— Albert Camus

#freedom #living #freedom

Knowing whether or not man is free involves knowing whether he can have a master. The absurdity peculiar to this problem comes from the fact that the very notion that makes the problem of freedom possible also takes away all its meaning. For in the presence of God there is less a problem of freedom than a problem of evil. You know the alternative: either we are not free and God the all-powerful is responsible for evil. Or we are free and responsible but God is not all powerful. All the scholastic subtleties have neither added anything to nor subtracted anything from the acuteness of this paradox. ↗

— Albert Camus

#freedom #god #freedom