#absurd

A brick and a blanket together create a blick. That’s it. That’s all I got. ↗

— Amy Summers

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

I've knitted myself a hat, it's plum red with an appealing lace pattern, I figured that a few air holes would be nice now that it's spring. I put it on and feel like a cranberry in the snow, and I wonder if they can see me from the moon. Me and the Great Wall. ↗

— Kjersti A. Skomsvold

#funny #funny

You can sit on a brick, and milk a cow with a blanket. ↗

— Nicole McKay

#bizarre #brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses

A blanket could be used as a lovely rug, a rug that just so happens to be covering a large hole, you should really feel this rug! ↗

— Nicole McKay

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

If warm air rises, Heaven could be hotter than Hell. ↗

— Steven Wright

#humor #humor

I’m beginning to sense a theme,” Mircea said, tossing his suit coat over a buckskin-covered chair. A moose head with huge, outspread antlers loomed over it, its bright glass eyes looking oddly lifelike in the low light. Mircea took in the room, his expression slightly repulsed yet fascinated. “I believe there is only one thing to say at this point.” What’s that?” Yee haw,” he said gravely, and took me down like a rodeo calf. ↗

— Karen Chance

#cassie #humor #mircea #humor

Everyone has a photographic Memory, some just don't have film. ↗

— Steven Wright

#humor #humor

Agatha and I rode off towards the sunset together. On a unicycle. Two bodies, one wheel, one seat, one love. And tomorrow Agatha’s clone and I will ride off towards the sunrise together. On a bicycle. Two bodies, two wheels, one seat, two loves, one chance to make our lives really ours, despite being a derivative. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#clone #love #love

That´s the problem with planning a late night supper after the opera, not only does the hero or the heroine die singing, but you end up famished after the last notes of the finale. ↗

— E.A. Bucchianeri

#funny #humor #humorous #humour #life

The other day I tried to design a finish line, but I didn’t know where to start. So I just sat there and drank Gatorade. Ah, but that’s life, no?
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#design #finish #gatorade #life #sat