#absurd

I became intrigued with colour theory. The absurd pronouncements of the Colour Institute, a group that decides what colours are hot each year or season, amused me. ↗

— John Barton

#amused #became #colour #colours #decides

Do you like flora and fauna? How about plants and animals? Because we have more of that beautiful crap than we know what to do with. Charmingly domesticated troops of monkeys swing freely throughout our orchid-laden property. You’re probably thinking that a lot of all-inclusive resorts have monkeys. True, but only one resort packs a monkey for each of their guests to take home. You’ll be showing off more than a tan to your friends, you’ll be showing off a gibbon. ↗

— Colin Nissan

#funny #humor #monkeys #resorts #beauty

Theatres are curious places, magician's trick-boxes where the golden memories of dramtic triumphs linger like nostalgic ghosts, and where the unexplainable, the fantastic, the tragic, the comic and the absurd are routine occurences on and off the stage. Murders, mayhem, politcal intrigue, lucrative business, secret assignations, and of course, dinner. ↗

— E.A. Bucchianeri

#actors #dinner #drama #dramatic #fantastic

I saw something scary. It was a boy, asking me what I’m doing naked in his father’s fridge. Dinner party’s over. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#dinner-party #dream #naked #scary #surreal

I consider conversations with people to be mind exercises, but I don't want to pull a muscle, so I stretch a lot. That's why I'm constantly either rolling my eyes or yawning. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#communication #conversations #funny #humor #mind

Dating should really be more like furniture store commercials....I would love to' pay no interest for 6 months ↗

— Josh Stern

#commercials-furniture #dating #store-humor #dating

I’m 30-years-old, and I still can’t get out from under my father’s shadow. He’s really tall, so maybe I’ll just ask him to move over a few feet. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#age #bizarre #family #father #feet

I want to be the world’s safest fashion designer. And I always wear my seatbelt, especially when I’m in the car. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#designer #fashion #safety #design

A brick could make everything better for me. Now, if I could only find a way to get my hands on one. But it’s a silly dream, because I don’t have the ambition to get out from under my blanket and go out and grab the very thing I most desire. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#ambition #brick-and-blanket #desire #dream #hope

I told her that my happy yellow teapot has a kinky backstory involving a nineteenth-century vegetarian sex cult in upstate New York whose members lived for three decades as self-proclaimed "Bible communists" before incorporating into the biggest supplier of dinnerware to the American food-service industry, not to mention harboring their most infamous resident, an irritating young maniac who, years after he moved away, was hanged for assassinating President Garfield. ↗

— Sarah Vowell

#yay-history #food