#drink

I rarely drink, but last night, after several hours and several beers at the bar, I found myself face to face with two huge boobs. They weren’t the breasts of a young woman, but those of an old man. Still, the taste of a nipple is genderless.
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— Jarod Kintz

#alcohol #awesome #bar #bizarre #drinking

Love is meant to be sipped, rather than chugged, like a glass of wine you drink strait from the bottle.
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— Dark Jar Tin Zoo

#funny #humor #love #wine #age

If you have children, you don't want to have drugs and drinks in the house. It's just not good. ↗

— Billie Joe Armstrong

#drinks #good #house #just #want

The only cure for a real hangover is death. ↗

— Robert Benchley

#drinking #hangovers #death

Let us eat and drink neither forgetting death unduly nor remembering it. The Lord hath mercy on whom he will have mercy, etc., and the less we think about it the better. ↗

— Samuel Butler

#better #death #drink #eat #etc

Death: "THERE ARE BETTER THINGS IN THE WORLD THAN ALCOHOL, ALBERT." Albert: "Oh, yes, sir. But alcohol sort of compensates for not getting them. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#death #drinking #humor #death

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat. ↗

— Alex Levin

#drinking #food-groups #humor #irish #food

There’s something wonderful about drinking in the afternoon. A not-too-cold pint, absolutely alone at the bar – even in this fake-ass Irish pub. ↗

— Anthony Bourdain

#food

The Eleven king looked sternly upon Thorin, when he was brought before him, and asked him many questions. But Thorin would only say that he was starving. "Why did you and your folk three times try to attack my people at their merrymaking?" asked the king. "We did not attack them," answered Thorin, "we came to beg because we were starving." "Where are your friends now, and what are they doing?" "I don't know, but I expect that they're all starving in the forest." "What were you doing in the forest?" "Looking for food and drink, because we were starving." "And what brought you into the forest at all?" asked the king angrily. At that Thorin shut his mouth and would not say another word. ↗

— J.R.R. Tolkien

#elves #food #friends #king #starving

The poor spend all their free time drinking. It helps cope with the terrible drudgery of obtaining food stamps. An ethic of alcoholism prevails among the upper class too, but they use leisure to deal with it. ↗

— Bauvard

#drinking #food-stamps #funny #humor #leisure