#humor

We have a certain warped sense of humor in Scandinavia, and that is what comes across in the choices in a lot of our movies. ↗

— Connie Nielsen

#certain #choices #comes #humor #lot

Finally, Charlie gave up the hunt and placed (the puppy) back on the floor, dispatching fleas was not his idea of a romantic evening, unless you happened to be a twisted exterminator, he thought. ↗

— E.A. Bucchianeri

#fleas #funny #humor #humour #pass-the-fleas-please

Humor starts like a wildfire, but then continues on, smoldering, smoldering for years. ↗

— Robert Orben

#humor #like #starts #then #wildfire

I remember when humor was gentle pokes. I used to call it 'arm around the shoulder' humor. Now they go for the jugular and they take no prisoners. It's mean, mean stuff. ↗

— Robert Orben

#around #call #gentle #go #humor

I’m a powerful being. I caused the night to turn into day. And I didn’t even try! I simply waited. I’ll bet I could even do it in my sleep. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#humor #funny

Put your middle finger and your thumb together. And make it snappy.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#humor #silly #snap #thumb #funny

Skulduggery stood among the ruins of what had once been a sofa. Valkyrie raised an eyebrow. 'I was trying to make up the sofa bed so you could get some rest,' he explained, and pointed to the second sofa across the room. 'Unfortunately, it would appear that that is the sofa bed, and this, apparently, is just a sofa. ↗

— Derek Landy

#furniture #humor #humorous #mistakes #death

When nobody practices what they strongly believe in, that day will be a triumph of prudence. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #humor #prudence #funny

If the world were coming to an end tomorrow, I’d probably call in sick to work. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#end-of-the-world #funny #humor #work #funny

I think in my case, I had no choice but to have a good sense of humor. I grew up with my dad, Danny Thomas, and George Burns and Bob Hope and Milton Berle and Sid Caesar and all those guys were at our house all the time and telling jokes and making each other laugh. ↗

— Marlo Thomas

#bob #bob hope #burns #caesar #case