#joke

He smiled proudly at the machine Ephraim was staring at. "That's our Coheron Drive. Isn't she beautiful? I helped build her." Ephraim glanced at the coin in his hand. Zoe patted his shoulder comfortingly. "Don't worry. Size doesn't matter in quantum mechanics," she said. "It's how you use it. ↗

— E.C. Myers

#joke #beauty

The whole experience of doing a sitcom is... Telling jokes with such precision is really exciting, but it's also terrifying. ↗

— Lea Thompson

#doing #exciting #experience #jokes #precision

Don't answer the door in a wedding dress and veil, he might not think you're joking. ↗

— Amy Sedaris

#jokes #relationships #romance #dating

Pathetic," he (Fred) told George. "Pathetic! With the whole wide world of ear-related humor, you go with 'holey'? ↗

— J.K. Rowling

#fred-weasley #george-weasley #hole #joke #death

A joke is an epigram on the death of a feeling. ↗

— Friedrich Nietzsche

#humour #jokes #death

The marvelous thing about a joke with a double meaning is that it can only mean one thing. ↗

— Ronnie Barker

#double #double meaning #joke #marvelous #marvelous thing

I've included these little jokes and mysteries in my writing for the amusement of readers. ↗

— Armistead Maupin

#i #included #jokes #little #mysteries

I frowned as my fingers throbbed. “Wait a sec. There’s a chance I can’t work with fire and you let me do that?”“How else am I going to figure out your limitations?” “What the hell!” I pulled my hand free, furious. “That’s not cool, Blake. What’s next? Trying to stop a moving vehicle by standing in front of it, but whoops, I can’t do that and now I’m dead? ↗

— Jennifer L. Armentrout

#death-jokes #funny #ssupernatural #training #ya

I’ve been on a diet for two weeks and all I’ve lost is two weeks!” -Totie Fields- ↗

— David DeBacco

#diet #jokes #diet

. . .when the album was done I loved it. It was a mixture of electric and acoustic solo performances with dubs. I called it Le Noise, after Dan. It was a French Canadian joke, a very English was of saying Lanois. I was doing a show that introduced a lot of the songs, and things were going great. I was very happy. ↗

— Neil Young

#joke #dreams